In amongst the usual disaster zone that is my life, I made time a the other week to go see Guardians of the Galaxy, and let me tell, it kicks many levels of arse.
Unlike Avengers Assemble, which was also very excellent, I wasn't that familiar with the characters. We haven't had a series of films to set everything up, instead being thrown into the life of one Peter Quill, self-appointed "Star Lord", a human adventuring in space due to circumstances best seen on screen. Through his usual reckless thieving, he ends up with more misfits on his case: Rocket (a Raccoon type animal genetically and bionically modified to speak like Bradley Cooper), Groot (a walking tree) and Gamora, a green skinned alien who is the adopted son of the rather nasty Thanos, who was the bad looking dude seen at the end of the Avengers flick. She has been tasked with recovering a relic by Ronan, a lacky (OR IS HE?) to Thanos to whom Gamora is working for alongside the big man's other daughter, Nebula.
It all ends with them locked up in clink for scrapping, where they meet the musclebound Drax the Destroyer, left extremely violent after his family were murdered, from which it all goes off and, plot spoilers aside, becomes very entertaining indeed.
I honestly couldn't find much to criticise about the whole affair. It looks great, has plenty of laughs, great music and for the main part, the casting is top notch. I've seen some jibes at the casting of pro wrestler Dave Bautista as Drax - personally, I found him excellent in the role, offering up some fine comic timing. I'd never seen anything of Chris Pratt before (having given up on Parks and Recreation before his character arrived), but I give the dude his dues: his playing of Quill was most excellent. People have been saying he's a Han Solo for the 21st century, which makes a lot of sense. Indeed, if Marvel play their cards right on this one, this franchise could well be the Star Wars for this generation - an opinion shared by a friend of mine who took the seven-year-old son of a friend to check this out, and was met with a demand to see it again right away.
Right now, it's impossible to give anything but kudos to Marvel: I've seen this and Captain America: The Winter Soldier in recent times and had nothing but a brilliant time, left eagerly wanting more of the characters I've seen. Anyone reading this who hasn't seen Guardians of the Galaxy should consider it, unless they can't stand the whole genre.
In other related news, I did get very excited when I saw some test footage for Deadpool reboot, all CGI with Ryan Reynolds voicing your favourite Fourth Wall breaker. However, it turned out to be from 2011, leaked for whatever reason. Reynolds played a Wade Wilson created in a rather regrettable fashion in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, and as a huge fan of the character, has been trying to make amends ever since, bless him. A Deadpool film done like the footage we have already seen would be a total hoot and I wish a plague of genital warts on whoever has not green lit it so far.
Showing posts with label games. Show all posts
Showing posts with label games. Show all posts
Monday, 11 August 2014
Saturday, 1 March 2014
Space Issues
Perhaps the first game that showed me the possibilities of video games as a storytelling device, and therefore one of the most important games in my life ever, was Wing Commander, released in 1990 as a project from the mind of one Chris Roberts.
It was originally released in 1990, but I came to it a few years later. Despite that, it still took me back with it graphics and the way the action held together. In brief: you were a rookie pilot doing your bit for the people of Earth in a huge war in space against the ruthless Kilrathi, who were anthropomorphic cat folk with a tough line in tradition and honour.
In hindsight, the story was incredibly linear, but by simple virtue of being able to choose your own name and "callsign" it offered a layer of immersion that was very rewarding for the time. You were thrown right onto the front as part of the crew of the Tigers Claw, most the "storyline" taking place in the bar.
Here, your fellow pilots would offer advice and inform you of the how the war is going, while the old guy behind the bar would regale tales of his own days of action. The chalkboard kept track of your kills, while medals and promotions were up for grabs if you showed your style. It may seem all very quaint from this distance, but it was well-written and offered new opportunities for the medium.
The success of Wing Commander meant a sequel quickly followed in 1991. In this, our hero finds his hero status relinquished due to odd circumstances, and he's packed off for ten years doing nothing work. Obviously, he finds his way back to the action to earn a chance to clear his name and save Earth, again. I can only assume Roberts got a bit excited, as the storyline offered more depth, with romantic interludes (yuck!), a Kilrathi defector on the crew and a human traitor in the ranks. Larks!
There was a fair bit of skill needed in the games: one hand on the joystick with a finger and thumb needed for guns and missiles, with your other hand on the keyboard ready to issue commands to your wing partner, swap weapons and chose targets. The different mission types, ships and colleagues all added variation and during the debriefs, it felt good when the Chief offered congrats for a job well done.
Unfortunately, for the third instalment, Chris Roberts fancied himself as George Lucas and wanted to make the scenes between missions all Full Motion Video. FMV had the double issue of being incredibly expensive and it took bloody ages to load up every scene. Also, within a few years as technology moved on, it all tended to look a bit ropey. Another of my favourite games, Gabriel Knight: Sins of the Fathers, went down the same path with the second in the series, The Beast Within, which has dated ten times worse than the older game.
At least 1994's Wing Commander III managed to snare some decent acting talent: Mark Hamill, John Rhys-Davies and Malcolm McDowell all rocked up to do credible jobs to the degree there were additional sequels. I had lost interest, though - the appeal of the first two in the series was that the main guy had MY name and I read his lines in MY voice. Suddenly, he looked and sounded like Mark Hamill and was called Christopher Blair, which is a frankly shite name for the hero of a space war hero.
There was an attempt to launch a film franchise, of which we'll say no more.
It was originally released in 1990, but I came to it a few years later. Despite that, it still took me back with it graphics and the way the action held together. In brief: you were a rookie pilot doing your bit for the people of Earth in a huge war in space against the ruthless Kilrathi, who were anthropomorphic cat folk with a tough line in tradition and honour.
In hindsight, the story was incredibly linear, but by simple virtue of being able to choose your own name and "callsign" it offered a layer of immersion that was very rewarding for the time. You were thrown right onto the front as part of the crew of the Tigers Claw, most the "storyline" taking place in the bar.
 |
| Drink helps with the space shakes, I'm told. |
The success of Wing Commander meant a sequel quickly followed in 1991. In this, our hero finds his hero status relinquished due to odd circumstances, and he's packed off for ten years doing nothing work. Obviously, he finds his way back to the action to earn a chance to clear his name and save Earth, again. I can only assume Roberts got a bit excited, as the storyline offered more depth, with romantic interludes (yuck!), a Kilrathi defector on the crew and a human traitor in the ranks. Larks!
 |
| Instead of denying it, why not embrace death? It is your only friend now. |
Unfortunately, for the third instalment, Chris Roberts fancied himself as George Lucas and wanted to make the scenes between missions all Full Motion Video. FMV had the double issue of being incredibly expensive and it took bloody ages to load up every scene. Also, within a few years as technology moved on, it all tended to look a bit ropey. Another of my favourite games, Gabriel Knight: Sins of the Fathers, went down the same path with the second in the series, The Beast Within, which has dated ten times worse than the older game.
At least 1994's Wing Commander III managed to snare some decent acting talent: Mark Hamill, John Rhys-Davies and Malcolm McDowell all rocked up to do credible jobs to the degree there were additional sequels. I had lost interest, though - the appeal of the first two in the series was that the main guy had MY name and I read his lines in MY voice. Suddenly, he looked and sounded like Mark Hamill and was called Christopher Blair, which is a frankly shite name for the hero of a space war hero.
 |
| Back in space again, eh? Bloody typecasting! |
Tuesday, 17 December 2013
Wintertime Blues
There’s several reasons I haven’t written anything on here, none of them actually any good.
Or maybe one is, in that I've just been too tired. This seems to happen every year, that I get to December and simply gas out and then head off home for Christmas week, where a few days of being fed by my mother replenishes my energy levels for another ten months or so. It’s pathetic, really, that I still need this at the age of 32.
There was also a fun few hours in hospital a bit ago, where I had a lump of plastic and metal shoved into my chest with no little force. The loop recorder (as they call it), is supposed to take a snap shot of my heart activity next time I have a black out, on the assumption someone I know is around to activate the thing with this little box thing I carry around with me. All I can say is that the process of putting it in may be the most painful experience of my life – but, hey, the girls love a scar. More importantly, a good friend of mine (who I hope reads this) is going through a hell of a lot worse at the moment, which puts my petty moaning into sharp relief.
What I have managed to do is a little bit of gaming, reading and listening to music.
The Last of Us
‘Citizen Kane of Gaming’, according to one review, which is a gross an overstatement as you’ll hear all year, for an experience that is essentially Resident Evil with a higher budget.
To it’s credit, the acting is excellent, especially Troy Baker as Joel, the male lead, and the storyline, although not exactly as amazing as Charlie Brooker makes out, is engaging to the degree that you keep playing through some somewhat atypical survival horror sections to see what happens next. That you spend the game playing as a man driven to amorality by virtue of just trying to survive in a world gone to shit is an interesting slant – especially as he makes no attempt to apologise or feel bad about his actions.
The Last of Us is about a linear a game I’ve played since Final Fantasy XIII (which also starred Troy Baker, funnily enough), which isn’t my cup o’tea most of the time, but it managed to look pretty enough to keep me interested and to it’s credit, the combat sections can provide some cool moments: blowing up a group of four armed-to-the-teeth soldiers with a well-placed nail bomb was a satisfying a game a moment as I’ve had all year.
Solid 8/10 experience for the whole package, but nowhere close to what the hype what have you believe – the game dynamics would get 6/10 from me on a good day.
Grand Theft Auto V
Call me shallow (because I am), but I bought right into the hype for this at the last moment. I had resolved to wait till the price come down a few months after release… but no, I ended up picking up on release and booking the following day off work to put in some serious time.
GTAV doesn’t give you much more leeway in the actual storyline than The Last of Us (bar one choice at the end which gives three different conclusions) but has a stronger perception of choice. Between missions, you’re free to explore a huge city, play games or just get up to the usual chaos you can in these games.
There’s issues with the storyline, in that Rockstar don’t seem to have got a handle on how to write good female characters. Like The Last of Us, there is a torture scene – but here, you have to take an active part rather than just watch. It made for an uncomfortable moment, but that’s the nature of the character you are playing at that time – he’s a complete psychopath with very little in the way of morals or grip on reality.
It hasn’t quite topped Vice City as my favourite GTA title, but it was a rewarding playthrough in any case, with plenty of laughs and moments of total awesomeness. More so than TLoU, it pushes games as a serious form of entertainment by sheer dint of how much it sold in the days after release – can only other medium compare with those figures?
Autobiography by Morrissey
Despite the likes of Private Eye getting all uptight about the sums being thrown around for the rights to this, Stretford Moz’s tome was among the most anticipated books of the year, surely?
As it was, we learn the guy sure can moan. It seems everyone in the world has at some point fucked him over, his mother excepted, or died young, though Elton John, of all people, leaves a positive impression in their single meeting. The details of his childhood are interesting, but there’s relatively little about the Smiths period – the man himself could justify this with the fact it made up only a small period of his life (five years), but it’s the part I would wager the majority of us are interested in. Apparently, he also remains in the dark as to why Johnny Marr quit.
What we do get is almost the same amount of space dedicated to the court case that pretty much put the mockers on the chance of there ever being a full Smiths reunion. Fair enough, it does appear Moz was done over by a vindictive judge, but he goes on, and on, and on. It sets a tone for a downhill slope, as his comeback ten years ago is described in a series of numbers of chart placings and attendance figures at gigs. The revelations of his romantic forays with men and women seem scant consolation for wading through the rest.
Catherine Wheel
I’ve actually made some inroads into writing a piece of this band, who are my favourite musical discovery of the year despite them not having released a note in over ten years. If I can sort my shit out, I'll try to finish my overview of their work.
Or maybe one is, in that I've just been too tired. This seems to happen every year, that I get to December and simply gas out and then head off home for Christmas week, where a few days of being fed by my mother replenishes my energy levels for another ten months or so. It’s pathetic, really, that I still need this at the age of 32.
There was also a fun few hours in hospital a bit ago, where I had a lump of plastic and metal shoved into my chest with no little force. The loop recorder (as they call it), is supposed to take a snap shot of my heart activity next time I have a black out, on the assumption someone I know is around to activate the thing with this little box thing I carry around with me. All I can say is that the process of putting it in may be the most painful experience of my life – but, hey, the girls love a scar. More importantly, a good friend of mine (who I hope reads this) is going through a hell of a lot worse at the moment, which puts my petty moaning into sharp relief.
What I have managed to do is a little bit of gaming, reading and listening to music.
The Last of Us
‘Citizen Kane of Gaming’, according to one review, which is a gross an overstatement as you’ll hear all year, for an experience that is essentially Resident Evil with a higher budget.
To it’s credit, the acting is excellent, especially Troy Baker as Joel, the male lead, and the storyline, although not exactly as amazing as Charlie Brooker makes out, is engaging to the degree that you keep playing through some somewhat atypical survival horror sections to see what happens next. That you spend the game playing as a man driven to amorality by virtue of just trying to survive in a world gone to shit is an interesting slant – especially as he makes no attempt to apologise or feel bad about his actions.
The Last of Us is about a linear a game I’ve played since Final Fantasy XIII (which also starred Troy Baker, funnily enough), which isn’t my cup o’tea most of the time, but it managed to look pretty enough to keep me interested and to it’s credit, the combat sections can provide some cool moments: blowing up a group of four armed-to-the-teeth soldiers with a well-placed nail bomb was a satisfying a game a moment as I’ve had all year.
Solid 8/10 experience for the whole package, but nowhere close to what the hype what have you believe – the game dynamics would get 6/10 from me on a good day.
Grand Theft Auto V
Call me shallow (because I am), but I bought right into the hype for this at the last moment. I had resolved to wait till the price come down a few months after release… but no, I ended up picking up on release and booking the following day off work to put in some serious time.
GTAV doesn’t give you much more leeway in the actual storyline than The Last of Us (bar one choice at the end which gives three different conclusions) but has a stronger perception of choice. Between missions, you’re free to explore a huge city, play games or just get up to the usual chaos you can in these games.
There’s issues with the storyline, in that Rockstar don’t seem to have got a handle on how to write good female characters. Like The Last of Us, there is a torture scene – but here, you have to take an active part rather than just watch. It made for an uncomfortable moment, but that’s the nature of the character you are playing at that time – he’s a complete psychopath with very little in the way of morals or grip on reality.
It hasn’t quite topped Vice City as my favourite GTA title, but it was a rewarding playthrough in any case, with plenty of laughs and moments of total awesomeness. More so than TLoU, it pushes games as a serious form of entertainment by sheer dint of how much it sold in the days after release – can only other medium compare with those figures?
Autobiography by Morrissey
Despite the likes of Private Eye getting all uptight about the sums being thrown around for the rights to this, Stretford Moz’s tome was among the most anticipated books of the year, surely?
As it was, we learn the guy sure can moan. It seems everyone in the world has at some point fucked him over, his mother excepted, or died young, though Elton John, of all people, leaves a positive impression in their single meeting. The details of his childhood are interesting, but there’s relatively little about the Smiths period – the man himself could justify this with the fact it made up only a small period of his life (five years), but it’s the part I would wager the majority of us are interested in. Apparently, he also remains in the dark as to why Johnny Marr quit.
What we do get is almost the same amount of space dedicated to the court case that pretty much put the mockers on the chance of there ever being a full Smiths reunion. Fair enough, it does appear Moz was done over by a vindictive judge, but he goes on, and on, and on. It sets a tone for a downhill slope, as his comeback ten years ago is described in a series of numbers of chart placings and attendance figures at gigs. The revelations of his romantic forays with men and women seem scant consolation for wading through the rest.
Catherine Wheel
I’ve actually made some inroads into writing a piece of this band, who are my favourite musical discovery of the year despite them not having released a note in over ten years. If I can sort my shit out, I'll try to finish my overview of their work.
Sunday, 27 October 2013
Past Amusements
Finding myself in a nostalgic mood, I thought back to days spent in amusement arcades. My hometown only had one, and it was full of fruit machines, one-armed bandits and the like. I had no interest in them. I had to wait for our holidays to Butlins in Ayr for those kind of kicks.
Back in the 1980s, home computers were still rather basic. My faithful old Sinclair +2, with it's massive 128k of memory, brought me many hours of gaming joy, but an arcade offered kicks on a whole new level. In the days of HD gaming with a Playstation and a decent sized TV, it seems like a different world that we had to leave the home to get gaming with full colour and amazing sounds.
As an aside, one time we swapped the joys of Ayr for the Pontins, in Southport. While in the arcade, playing what I remember as a kind of Spy Hunter clone, I was pushed aside by a bigger boy (I was seven) who took my turn. I was found in tears by my cousin, who was nine years older than me and a bit more "handy". Within minutes, I had my turn back and a few extra 20p pieces for my trouble. So, for you, big man, my hero ever since, here are my choice arcade classics on which many a coin was spent.
You see, living in a small town in the back end of nowhere, we didn't have much in the way of glamour. Out Run offered a whole warehouse of it. Drive a Ferrari, with a girl beside you, racing across exotic locations at high speed. What more could I want?
The selling point, I think I can state with authority, was the soundtrack. Talk to someone (OK, a man) of my age and play Magical Sound Shower and you'll see them glaze over.
I remember the first time I played Out Run. It was in Blackpool, on a day trip, and you had to sit in a car shaped cabinet in which my feet just touched the pedals - lucky I was tall for my age. As it happened, I wiped out on the first corner and stormed off in a sulk before my dad told me that didn't mean it was game over. Alas, the wasted seconds did mean it soon was.
Needless to say, there was a lot of killing to be done if you were to rescue the hostages that had been taken for a reason I can't remember, if there even was one. All that mattered was that they were there, and about 5000 soldiers needed to be slaughtered to get to them. Not that I ever got to the end. No, I saw this instead:
Back in the 1980s, home computers were still rather basic. My faithful old Sinclair +2, with it's massive 128k of memory, brought me many hours of gaming joy, but an arcade offered kicks on a whole new level. In the days of HD gaming with a Playstation and a decent sized TV, it seems like a different world that we had to leave the home to get gaming with full colour and amazing sounds.
As an aside, one time we swapped the joys of Ayr for the Pontins, in Southport. While in the arcade, playing what I remember as a kind of Spy Hunter clone, I was pushed aside by a bigger boy (I was seven) who took my turn. I was found in tears by my cousin, who was nine years older than me and a bit more "handy". Within minutes, I had my turn back and a few extra 20p pieces for my trouble. So, for you, big man, my hero ever since, here are my choice arcade classics on which many a coin was spent.
Out Run
 |
| Bloody Sunday drivers! |
The selling point, I think I can state with authority, was the soundtrack. Talk to someone (OK, a man) of my age and play Magical Sound Shower and you'll see them glaze over.
I remember the first time I played Out Run. It was in Blackpool, on a day trip, and you had to sit in a car shaped cabinet in which my feet just touched the pedals - lucky I was tall for my age. As it happened, I wiped out on the first corner and stormed off in a sulk before my dad told me that didn't mean it was game over. Alas, the wasted seconds did mean it soon was.
Rampage
 |
| High rise living ain't too bad. Unless this happens. |
So, some bizarre accident turns you into a huge monster. The obvious response is to destroy just about every city in the USA. I'm sure we can all relate to the premise that Rampage brought us.
Playing either a giant ape, lizard or wolf, the mission was to just destroy as much as possible, while avoiding the unwanted attentions of the military, who don't take kindly to your attempts at town planning.
I'm not sure how "new" it was that you could have three players going at the same time was, but it felt amazing at the time. It meant my moaning brother could join in, though my dad remained constantly useless and would generally skulk off back to the bar area after being defeated early doors. On the plus side, it meant random strangers could join in - nice way to make friends amongst the usual "entertainment" that a holiday at Butlins involved.
Operation Wolf
What this had, which I'd never seen before, was a copy of a Uzi submachine gun attached to the cabinet. You had to aim with this to kill all the mooks that were unfortunate enough to cross your sights, which seemed revolutionary at the time.
 |
| Another quiet trip to the shops ruined, then |
 |
| Shouldn't have had that kebab last night, eh? |
At least they were polite about your death.
Sunday, 14 April 2013
Tying Up The Trilogy
Having had, as already mentioned, a week off recently, I made the reluctant option to spunk around £30 on all the last three bits of Downloadable Content for Mass Effect 3. I didn't really want to do this, but the option of some extra time with characters I'd grown to love was too much.
This is what I think of all of them. Being spoiler-free on the DLC, but not on the ME3 in general.
Leviathan
So, call comes through, our man Shepard is told some science bod may have found a whole new grade-A weapon against the Reapers. Well, we gotta have that, right? So begins an only-vaguely interested series of jobs, too many of which involve hanging around the scientist's gaff. There's precious little new content in terms of your crew outside EDI, Cortez and a little bit with Vega.
I think it took me around three hours to complete it. For the money I paid, that is frankly pathetic. It does provide some interesting background on the Reapers and their origins, but you can see all that on youtube if you so wish.
Omega
Of course, Aria L'Toak was one of the best characters in Mass Effect 2, a totally amoral bitch who didn't give one about anything bar her own status and power. By the time of ME3, we all know Cerberus booted her off her own kingdom and she wasn't happy about it. Thus, we now get to help her get what she lost back.
This is obviously a good thing, as is that you get to scrap against Aria and someone left behind on Omega, a female Turian (the first we get to meet) named Nyreen. Having read the comic book chucked in with the special edition off the original ME3, I had some idea of what was going on here. Others won't be so lucky, as it doesn't offer much in the way of explanation. The basic gist is to kick Cerberus arse, essentially. You can't bring any of your team - Aria doesn't trust them, apparently - which is a wee bit of let down.
It's a fun little diversion, but still not enough to justify paying a tenner for, given the length of play. One particularly annoying trait was the bigging up of a new kind of enemy as being some unstoppable killing machine, only for them to not be much tougher than yer average Reaper forces.
Citadel
This is more like it. Admiral Anderson orders the ship and crew to dock in and enjoy some R&R. It all goes guns akimbo in no time, natch, as Shep finds a plot to have him knocked off by a mysterious new enemy. All part of a normal day, really.
There's a hell of lot more than just that, though. For starters, you can get Wrex back in your squad if he's alive, which is very cool. You also get use of Anderson's somewhat swanky flat, to which your crew will pay visits. Bizarrely, if you've romanced Tali, she'll sing some weird musical number to you. On top of that, you get a arcade, casino and combat simulator to play in.
The central plot of the DLC is solid enough, with plenty of chuckles. If you've managed to avoid everyone alive to the end of ME3 (just prior to the attack on the Cerberus base) then you'll get the full worth of the content - don't play through it before you've resolved everyone's issues. As a reward, you'll get to enjoy the sights of pretty much all your friends from over the series having a bit of a party and getting a tad wasted.
Citadel is the only piece of ME3 DLC that I would put down as a "vital". The other two are fine, but only worth getting if you have plenty of cash spare. Citadel, however, is a nice little "see ya" to the series, and a wee bit of compo for the lousy ending.
It's a fun little diversion, but still not enough to justify paying a tenner for, given the length of play. One particularly annoying trait was the bigging up of a new kind of enemy as being some unstoppable killing machine, only for them to not be much tougher than yer average Reaper forces.
Citadel
This is more like it. Admiral Anderson orders the ship and crew to dock in and enjoy some R&R. It all goes guns akimbo in no time, natch, as Shep finds a plot to have him knocked off by a mysterious new enemy. All part of a normal day, really.
There's a hell of lot more than just that, though. For starters, you can get Wrex back in your squad if he's alive, which is very cool. You also get use of Anderson's somewhat swanky flat, to which your crew will pay visits. Bizarrely, if you've romanced Tali, she'll sing some weird musical number to you. On top of that, you get a arcade, casino and combat simulator to play in.
The central plot of the DLC is solid enough, with plenty of chuckles. If you've managed to avoid everyone alive to the end of ME3 (just prior to the attack on the Cerberus base) then you'll get the full worth of the content - don't play through it before you've resolved everyone's issues. As a reward, you'll get to enjoy the sights of pretty much all your friends from over the series having a bit of a party and getting a tad wasted.
Citadel is the only piece of ME3 DLC that I would put down as a "vital". The other two are fine, but only worth getting if you have plenty of cash spare. Citadel, however, is a nice little "see ya" to the series, and a wee bit of compo for the lousy ending.
Sunday, 9 December 2012
Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick. Or Gun.
So, you wait six years for a game and when you know it's finally coming, your expectation goes through the roof. Can it meet expectation? Obviously not.
Actually, that may be a little unfair on Hitman: Absolution. It was fun to play through, just not the kind of fun I wanted from it. Over the first decade of this millennium, the Hitman franchise had established itself on the Playstation 2-era as offering superb gaming, engaging us to examine situations as best we could to pull off the perfect hit. I can remember spending hours outside of gaming musing on an area, wondering how to get in and out unseen with the target eliminated.
With that in mind, my heart raced at the possibilities the next generation of console gaming would offer the makers. I envisioned puzzles so complex my head would explode at the thought of doing Agent 47 justice. Instead, we got a fairly good stealth thriller.
The story: Agent 47 is a genetically-warped freak who has made a nice living from being the world's top contract killer. At the start of the game, he's sent by the International Contract Agency (his constant employers) to knock off his former handler, Diane, as she's gone rogue. But in a series of somewhat tired plot clichés, he's subsequently entrusted with the task of protecting a teenage girl (ehhh...) in a stupid school uniform (oh, please) who is wanted by a psychotic redneck businessman and the pissed-off big cheese back at ICA. Thus, you can gather the rest.
The story actually bugs several times, as we get 47 making schoolboy mistakes you wouldn't expect of him that allow him to get out-thought by characters best described as fucking inbred idiots. Plus we have the worrying spectre of the characters known as "The Saints" - young women dressed in S&M nun outfits. It comes across as little but wank fantasy and offers the best part of fuck all to proceedings.
Let's be kind about the good things: this game looks amazing. The locations, the cut scenes - it matches the level set by games like Max Payne 3 and Deus Ex: Human Revolution in presentation levels. Plus the voice acting is a good level - Powers Booth and Keith Carradine are suitably hatstand as the bad guys and we can thank the Gaming Gods that they got David Bateson back in to voice 47, after initially deciding otherwise. The dude simply is the character, and his cold, emotionless tones hide the deeper anger the character feels but cannot express.
When the game gives us what we want, it excels. There are a handful of times we are given a wide area with a target and told to kill them. Naturally, we can wade in guns akimbo, but the challenge is to execute the perfect hit, which is how the game should be. But it feels a rare treat, as mostly we are given a room/area and essentially told to go from one side to the other, preferably with the most stealth as possible.
I've read reviews since I finished the game, and agree with the feeling that this strays far too much from what we expect of these games and into Splinter Cell land. It may look great, and even play well (there is a certain satisfaction from timing your runs to perfection to avoid a guard's movement) but it's not what we signed up for when we bought the game.
Despite all that, I hope they make another Hitman game and perhaps go back to the roots that made the series so compelling in the first place. We want the chance to use our imagination to knock off some poor piece of shite scum, then walk out as calm as you like. Not a quasi-stealth game with a Hollywood b-movie plot stuck to it.
Actually, that may be a little unfair on Hitman: Absolution. It was fun to play through, just not the kind of fun I wanted from it. Over the first decade of this millennium, the Hitman franchise had established itself on the Playstation 2-era as offering superb gaming, engaging us to examine situations as best we could to pull off the perfect hit. I can remember spending hours outside of gaming musing on an area, wondering how to get in and out unseen with the target eliminated.
With that in mind, my heart raced at the possibilities the next generation of console gaming would offer the makers. I envisioned puzzles so complex my head would explode at the thought of doing Agent 47 justice. Instead, we got a fairly good stealth thriller.
The story: Agent 47 is a genetically-warped freak who has made a nice living from being the world's top contract killer. At the start of the game, he's sent by the International Contract Agency (his constant employers) to knock off his former handler, Diane, as she's gone rogue. But in a series of somewhat tired plot clichés, he's subsequently entrusted with the task of protecting a teenage girl (ehhh...) in a stupid school uniform (oh, please) who is wanted by a psychotic redneck businessman and the pissed-off big cheese back at ICA. Thus, you can gather the rest.
The story actually bugs several times, as we get 47 making schoolboy mistakes you wouldn't expect of him that allow him to get out-thought by characters best described as fucking inbred idiots. Plus we have the worrying spectre of the characters known as "The Saints" - young women dressed in S&M nun outfits. It comes across as little but wank fantasy and offers the best part of fuck all to proceedings.
Let's be kind about the good things: this game looks amazing. The locations, the cut scenes - it matches the level set by games like Max Payne 3 and Deus Ex: Human Revolution in presentation levels. Plus the voice acting is a good level - Powers Booth and Keith Carradine are suitably hatstand as the bad guys and we can thank the Gaming Gods that they got David Bateson back in to voice 47, after initially deciding otherwise. The dude simply is the character, and his cold, emotionless tones hide the deeper anger the character feels but cannot express.
When the game gives us what we want, it excels. There are a handful of times we are given a wide area with a target and told to kill them. Naturally, we can wade in guns akimbo, but the challenge is to execute the perfect hit, which is how the game should be. But it feels a rare treat, as mostly we are given a room/area and essentially told to go from one side to the other, preferably with the most stealth as possible.
I've read reviews since I finished the game, and agree with the feeling that this strays far too much from what we expect of these games and into Splinter Cell land. It may look great, and even play well (there is a certain satisfaction from timing your runs to perfection to avoid a guard's movement) but it's not what we signed up for when we bought the game.
Despite all that, I hope they make another Hitman game and perhaps go back to the roots that made the series so compelling in the first place. We want the chance to use our imagination to knock off some poor piece of shite scum, then walk out as calm as you like. Not a quasi-stealth game with a Hollywood b-movie plot stuck to it.
 |
| Bald of Awesome, shame about the game |
Monday, 3 December 2012
Not Managing to Keep Up
I've been far, far too lazy on the blogging front. I've got my excuses: right now, work is fucking me off to the point I have little inclination for typing away in my evenings. Plus, of course has seen the news that some royal has been succesfully impregnated means I will have to play the national anthem 20 times every night.
Alright, so I don't actually give a toss about some over-privileged tosspots expecting another freeloading parasite. The real reason I haven't wrote 'owt is that I bought Football Manager 2013. As any one who has dared enter this world knows, you don't escape easily. It's even pulled me away from Hitman: Absolution, of which more when I finally get round to finishing it.
As it is, I've an unbeaten run to protect. Whenever I re-enter the world of Football Manager, I always play a game as Manchester United to get my bearings before engaging on a proper challenge with a bunch of non-league no-hopers, like Workington. So far, I've managed to get close to Christmas with an impressive sequence of results, leaving the league table looking like this:
Have that one, Fergie! Sack off all those other pretenders - clearly I'm the man for the job when they drag your body out of Old Trafford.
Alright, so I don't actually give a toss about some over-privileged tosspots expecting another freeloading parasite. The real reason I haven't wrote 'owt is that I bought Football Manager 2013. As any one who has dared enter this world knows, you don't escape easily. It's even pulled me away from Hitman: Absolution, of which more when I finally get round to finishing it.
As it is, I've an unbeaten run to protect. Whenever I re-enter the world of Football Manager, I always play a game as Manchester United to get my bearings before engaging on a proper challenge with a bunch of non-league no-hopers, like Workington. So far, I've managed to get close to Christmas with an impressive sequence of results, leaving the league table looking like this:
Have that one, Fergie! Sack off all those other pretenders - clearly I'm the man for the job when they drag your body out of Old Trafford.
Tuesday, 6 November 2012
ALF Must Die!
What have I done? By buying XCom: Enemy Unknown have I just thrown away at vague vestiges at any kind of real "life"? Probably.
Already, its received rave reviews from just about everywhere. Which isn't surprising, as I expect a lot of video game journalists are around the same age as me. Thus, they remember the original UFO: Enemy Unknown in 1994 as a high watermark of the drama you can get from being sat at a computer. So I was very keen to sample an updated version of this, with the added bonus of being old enough to (hopefully) be better at the resource management side of the games that is as equally vital as killing aliens.
The basic gist isn't hard to work out: nasty things from space are coming to get us, and they obviously need stopping. To do this, we (the player) have been charged with leading XCOM, the squad formed to get the job done. Cut scenes add a sense of drama as we're introduced to the backroom bods developing new weapons and cutting up aliens on the autopsy table. A handy tutorial eases you into the battle scenes, which I imagine will be very handy for younger players.
Because, XCOM works on a turn based system, which in an age of 100mph racers and frantic first person shooters, may seem a little quaint. You also can't just go wading into the field guns ablazin', hoping to kick some ET arse. Patience, forward planning and using your whole squad are order of the day, making the scraps more like a game of chess.
For me, so far, having only bought the game on Monday, it has created moments of incredible high tension: a solider hiding in cover - do I risk them running across open ground or play safe? The aliens punish bad moves without no mercy, and the fact you can name your troops just makes it worse when you fool yourself it's a good friend of yours under fire: Captain Simon "Crash" (the games provides nicknames for those that last long enough to gain the experience) Vint has managed to hold the line for me so far, though, so top work Si!
XCOM Enemy Unknown is one of the most compelling video game experiences of my life, even only this early into the game. I'm faintly aware that tradition dictates a whole heap of shite from another universe is about to fall on my lap (they can't keep throwing mooks at me, surely), but that adds to the drama. Around every corner could be some huge fucker like Predator waiting to munch on my poor troop's lower intestine. If you don't hear from me a while, I'll be hunched over my control pad, worrying about just that...
Already, its received rave reviews from just about everywhere. Which isn't surprising, as I expect a lot of video game journalists are around the same age as me. Thus, they remember the original UFO: Enemy Unknown in 1994 as a high watermark of the drama you can get from being sat at a computer. So I was very keen to sample an updated version of this, with the added bonus of being old enough to (hopefully) be better at the resource management side of the games that is as equally vital as killing aliens.
The basic gist isn't hard to work out: nasty things from space are coming to get us, and they obviously need stopping. To do this, we (the player) have been charged with leading XCOM, the squad formed to get the job done. Cut scenes add a sense of drama as we're introduced to the backroom bods developing new weapons and cutting up aliens on the autopsy table. A handy tutorial eases you into the battle scenes, which I imagine will be very handy for younger players.
Because, XCOM works on a turn based system, which in an age of 100mph racers and frantic first person shooters, may seem a little quaint. You also can't just go wading into the field guns ablazin', hoping to kick some ET arse. Patience, forward planning and using your whole squad are order of the day, making the scraps more like a game of chess.
For me, so far, having only bought the game on Monday, it has created moments of incredible high tension: a solider hiding in cover - do I risk them running across open ground or play safe? The aliens punish bad moves without no mercy, and the fact you can name your troops just makes it worse when you fool yourself it's a good friend of yours under fire: Captain Simon "Crash" (the games provides nicknames for those that last long enough to gain the experience) Vint has managed to hold the line for me so far, though, so top work Si!
XCOM Enemy Unknown is one of the most compelling video game experiences of my life, even only this early into the game. I'm faintly aware that tradition dictates a whole heap of shite from another universe is about to fall on my lap (they can't keep throwing mooks at me, surely), but that adds to the drama. Around every corner could be some huge fucker like Predator waiting to munch on my poor troop's lower intestine. If you don't hear from me a while, I'll be hunched over my control pad, worrying about just that...
Friday, 29 June 2012
Everybody Loves a Happy Ending
After a little bit of waiting, the Mass Effect 3 extended cut ending has been sent out for our viewing. What's the verdict? Well, the best word I can think of is 'meh'. Spoilers abound, kiddies.
Because it was never going to change anything. Developers Bioware said they weren't going to change the ending per se, which was fair enough. In the final reckoning, it's their game and their ending to fuck up. After all, I don't send my copy for Abbey Road to the surviving Beatles with a note saying "Her Majesty as the last song in your career? Fuck off and do a proper song!". If we are to accept video games as art, as we should, we have to put off with not liking everything we get.
So, there's still the three endings we had before (as well, apparently, as an option to ignore them all, which I haven't tried out) but with added bonus between the choice and Buzz Aldrin talking to some little kid. Now, we get a few minutes of narration from a character to whom the choice relates over pictures relating to how you got on. I went with how I went first time originally, so had EDI praising my sacrifice and how the future was all looking rosy while we saw Zaeed relaxing on the beach, Rex with his baby and everyone looking very happy. Not animations, mind, just pictures, which seems a little bit cheap.
All the same, it's an improvement on what we got but the conspiracy theorist in me thinks these were always meant to be there, but they ran out of time before the release date. I mean, would they really spend the money to get the voice actors back in the studio to record the dialogue? Lance Henriksen isn't that cheap, surely? If they did, however, then major kudos.
However, I still would have liked to see some reaction from Tali, who was the other half in the romance sub-plot I went down. In the ending, EDI seemed more upset that I'd thrown a seven than my supposed girlfriend. Maybe she just using me. Bah. Or perhaps there's further DLC to come where Shepard says just before the big battle "yeah, I think we should take a break from dating a while..."
More seriously, though this DLC kills off some bugbears, it hasn't made me want to go play Mass Effect 3 again in a hurry. There still didn't seem to be any real satisfactory conclusions from my actions to make me want to play through with different consequences. Perhaps further content with go down that road.
Because it was never going to change anything. Developers Bioware said they weren't going to change the ending per se, which was fair enough. In the final reckoning, it's their game and their ending to fuck up. After all, I don't send my copy for Abbey Road to the surviving Beatles with a note saying "Her Majesty as the last song in your career? Fuck off and do a proper song!". If we are to accept video games as art, as we should, we have to put off with not liking everything we get.
So, there's still the three endings we had before (as well, apparently, as an option to ignore them all, which I haven't tried out) but with added bonus between the choice and Buzz Aldrin talking to some little kid. Now, we get a few minutes of narration from a character to whom the choice relates over pictures relating to how you got on. I went with how I went first time originally, so had EDI praising my sacrifice and how the future was all looking rosy while we saw Zaeed relaxing on the beach, Rex with his baby and everyone looking very happy. Not animations, mind, just pictures, which seems a little bit cheap.
All the same, it's an improvement on what we got but the conspiracy theorist in me thinks these were always meant to be there, but they ran out of time before the release date. I mean, would they really spend the money to get the voice actors back in the studio to record the dialogue? Lance Henriksen isn't that cheap, surely? If they did, however, then major kudos.
However, I still would have liked to see some reaction from Tali, who was the other half in the romance sub-plot I went down. In the ending, EDI seemed more upset that I'd thrown a seven than my supposed girlfriend. Maybe she just using me. Bah. Or perhaps there's further DLC to come where Shepard says just before the big battle "yeah, I think we should take a break from dating a while..."
More seriously, though this DLC kills off some bugbears, it hasn't made me want to go play Mass Effect 3 again in a hurry. There still didn't seem to be any real satisfactory conclusions from my actions to make me want to play through with different consequences. Perhaps further content with go down that road.
Wednesday, 30 May 2012
Pills 'n' Thrills and Gunshot Wounds
Max Payne - silly name, great games. For the first two at least, and they were a long time ago. Indeed, it's been nearly a whole decade since we saw NYPD's finest in action. The comeback for his third run out has been highly publicised with adverts on TV and in cinemas, posters on bus shelters all over Manchester. I admit to being intrigued and buying it days after release. I completed it last night - so here's The Tedious World verdict.
So, we find our Max at something of a low ebb. Still understandably haunted by the murder of his wife and child, he's quit working for the Plod and retired to New Jersey where he embarks on a life where a good night is one spent washing down painkillers with a bottle of the hard stuff. Doubtless his habit worsened when he found out there was a terrible film put out in his name. Unfortunately, Max commits something of a social faux pas and has to quickly leave town. Luckily, an offer doing apparently easy bodyguard work in Sao Paulo, Brazil, comes up at the right time, and off he goes.
Thankfully for us, it's not that easy and before long, Max - the sorry sonofabitch - is caught up in all manner of carnage to which the only solution seems to be lots of gunplay. And what fun it is! Violence of the highest order is in store throughout, with not much time to breathe: when a game starts (like the first one, the story starts near the end) with the hero standing over a still-alive body that has lost an arm and been very well cooked from an explosion, ready to execute him, you know this isn't going to be a calming experience.
In the previous games, the use of bullet time was pretty much all there was to the action. Enter a room, see mooks, do a cool dive in bullet time while emptying your clips into their bodies. Job done. Now, it's a wee bit more complicated. Going in face first against five well-equipped bods wearing body armour is only going to end up with a rapid course of facial realignment through gun surgery. Essentially, you need to use cover to time your moves. Naturally, this can slow the combat down by the pace of the older games, but also adds tension of using your bullet-time at the exact right moment to emerge from behind a pillar and quickly dispatch a bit of lead into head.
A great feature is the slow motion shots of the final kills in an area: fire off the round and watch it glide through the air before it makes contact with the target, blood covering nearby surfaces while the body collapses limply. Yes, I'm probably a bit sick in the head to enjoy this so much.
All the same, Max is beyond burnt-out, the screen jarring and blurring to reflect his pickled state of mind. Neck a painkiller at a bad moment and it's a lot harder to get a clear bead on anyone. Diving into a room in slow-mo might look awesome, but our poor hero isn't as young as he used to be and he'll slowly get back to his feet - a fatal mistake if timed wrong.
The main strength for this gamer, however, is the story. Rockstar have a reputation on this front from the Grand Theft Auto series and they carry it off here in style. Mixing the insane action set-pieces from Hollywood shooters with a character straight out of a Humphrey Bogart flick: indeed, the first few chapters see our hero well under the influence of a few over the eight. Luckily, James McCarthy once again does a top-notch job voicing Max, being able to bring pathos and plenty of humour to the proceedings.
All these factors make that this is pretty much a totally linear game not a huge issue. Normally, I'll get frustrated by such games from feeling limited in my control. With Max Payne 3, you're having way too much fun watching Max go from one mess to another, from the penthouses and nightclubs of the rich to the extreme poverty of the slums, stumbling his way through hell motivated apparently only by sheer stubbornness.
One line that tickled me immensely is when Max reflects that he and the woman he is protecting from an endless stream of goons aren't exactly a SEAL team. Given his bodycount over three games must be well into four figures, he's a bit hard on himself. Mr Payne is nothing less than a human killing machine of the highest order, mowing down masses of helpless thugs with no help, taking insane risks fuelled only by large amounts of Scotch and pharmaceuticals. Top man!
A highly recommend experience in my book then, and I've not even touched the multi-player mode, which I'm told is pretty handy. The tourist board in Sao Paulo may want to give this a miss though...
So, we find our Max at something of a low ebb. Still understandably haunted by the murder of his wife and child, he's quit working for the Plod and retired to New Jersey where he embarks on a life where a good night is one spent washing down painkillers with a bottle of the hard stuff. Doubtless his habit worsened when he found out there was a terrible film put out in his name. Unfortunately, Max commits something of a social faux pas and has to quickly leave town. Luckily, an offer doing apparently easy bodyguard work in Sao Paulo, Brazil, comes up at the right time, and off he goes.
Thankfully for us, it's not that easy and before long, Max - the sorry sonofabitch - is caught up in all manner of carnage to which the only solution seems to be lots of gunplay. And what fun it is! Violence of the highest order is in store throughout, with not much time to breathe: when a game starts (like the first one, the story starts near the end) with the hero standing over a still-alive body that has lost an arm and been very well cooked from an explosion, ready to execute him, you know this isn't going to be a calming experience.
In the previous games, the use of bullet time was pretty much all there was to the action. Enter a room, see mooks, do a cool dive in bullet time while emptying your clips into their bodies. Job done. Now, it's a wee bit more complicated. Going in face first against five well-equipped bods wearing body armour is only going to end up with a rapid course of facial realignment through gun surgery. Essentially, you need to use cover to time your moves. Naturally, this can slow the combat down by the pace of the older games, but also adds tension of using your bullet-time at the exact right moment to emerge from behind a pillar and quickly dispatch a bit of lead into head.
A great feature is the slow motion shots of the final kills in an area: fire off the round and watch it glide through the air before it makes contact with the target, blood covering nearby surfaces while the body collapses limply. Yes, I'm probably a bit sick in the head to enjoy this so much.
All the same, Max is beyond burnt-out, the screen jarring and blurring to reflect his pickled state of mind. Neck a painkiller at a bad moment and it's a lot harder to get a clear bead on anyone. Diving into a room in slow-mo might look awesome, but our poor hero isn't as young as he used to be and he'll slowly get back to his feet - a fatal mistake if timed wrong.
The main strength for this gamer, however, is the story. Rockstar have a reputation on this front from the Grand Theft Auto series and they carry it off here in style. Mixing the insane action set-pieces from Hollywood shooters with a character straight out of a Humphrey Bogart flick: indeed, the first few chapters see our hero well under the influence of a few over the eight. Luckily, James McCarthy once again does a top-notch job voicing Max, being able to bring pathos and plenty of humour to the proceedings.
All these factors make that this is pretty much a totally linear game not a huge issue. Normally, I'll get frustrated by such games from feeling limited in my control. With Max Payne 3, you're having way too much fun watching Max go from one mess to another, from the penthouses and nightclubs of the rich to the extreme poverty of the slums, stumbling his way through hell motivated apparently only by sheer stubbornness.
One line that tickled me immensely is when Max reflects that he and the woman he is protecting from an endless stream of goons aren't exactly a SEAL team. Given his bodycount over three games must be well into four figures, he's a bit hard on himself. Mr Payne is nothing less than a human killing machine of the highest order, mowing down masses of helpless thugs with no help, taking insane risks fuelled only by large amounts of Scotch and pharmaceuticals. Top man!
A highly recommend experience in my book then, and I've not even touched the multi-player mode, which I'm told is pretty handy. The tourist board in Sao Paulo may want to give this a miss though...
Thursday, 17 May 2012
Master of the Domain
As described in a previous post, the humble ZX Spectrum was my introduction to the fab world of video games. The next step up was the Sega Master System. My childhood best friend* had one and our games of Great Golf and Enduro Racer made me feel envious. Needless to say, I was a happy wee bunny the Christmas Day my parents were kind enough to stump up £99.99 as a present to me. That really was a fair wedge in them days.
As we have now with XBox vs Playstation, the battlelines of the time were either Master System or the Nintendo Entertainment System (NES). For me, there was no competition: I mean, look at the faithful Sega below.
Good shape, nice black and red colour scheme. The NES, by contrast, looked like Commander Data's lunchbox. It also was a world away from the Spectrum gaming I'd been used to: no more loading times, lots of colour and better sounds.
Of course, this all came with a cost. I was used to paying £1.99 for a game, a month's pocket money. Even the cheapest games for this cost a tenner, and they tended to be of the atrocious quality of Transbot. Luckily, my Master System had Hang-On and Safari Hunt built in and ma and pa had managed to swing a deal somewhere so that California Games and Chase HQ were in the bundle.
The latter wasn't all that cop, but the former was an absolute classic. It looked great, sounded great and the range of events (Half-Pipe skateboarding, foot bag, surfing, skating, BMX, frisbee throwing) provided plenty of variety, especially if you played with a bunch of mates. I especially liked the BMX event, which allowed me to do tricks that in the real world would have resulted in a lengthy spell in a wheelchair.
But what really gives me a nostalgic tear in the eye is the box art of the early games. Take a look at this one, for World Soccer.
Here we see a disembodied leg, perhaps a distant relation of Thing from the Addams Family, trap the ball with no shortage of skill. The game itself was pretty limited: you could only play one-off games from two of eight teams (from memory: Great Britain (!), France, Germany, Italy, USA, Japan, Brazil and Argentina - spot the two put in for marketing purposes) or have a penalty shoot-out. Still, hours of fun at the time, especially when you pulled off a goal from an overhead kick.
The packaging on these early games was a long shot from the mess of images you get now. On the back, you'd have two screenshots and a brief description of the game. Essentially, you were taking a chance with your money and it wasn't until the 1990s rolled around and stuff like Sonic the Hedgehog put the kitchen sink on the box that it changed. All the same, it has a certain comforting uniformity about it - as I get when I hear that little jingle you got when you fired the console up.
I never moved on to the Master System's successor, the Mega Drive. I lost interest in gaming outside the Championship Manager series (an addiction to which doubtless left my friends and I with no time to do much else anyways) until I went to university and discovered the wonders of Playstation. All the same, the old girl lies in a bag under my bed, almost tempting me to fire it up one more time. Or I would, if the damn controller wasn't knackered...
*A few months ago, our mothers met in our hometown and the news was passed to me that he was living in Kidderminster, had recently got married and was expecting to become a father. That made me feel old.
As we have now with XBox vs Playstation, the battlelines of the time were either Master System or the Nintendo Entertainment System (NES). For me, there was no competition: I mean, look at the faithful Sega below.
Of course, this all came with a cost. I was used to paying £1.99 for a game, a month's pocket money. Even the cheapest games for this cost a tenner, and they tended to be of the atrocious quality of Transbot. Luckily, my Master System had Hang-On and Safari Hunt built in and ma and pa had managed to swing a deal somewhere so that California Games and Chase HQ were in the bundle.
The latter wasn't all that cop, but the former was an absolute classic. It looked great, sounded great and the range of events (Half-Pipe skateboarding, foot bag, surfing, skating, BMX, frisbee throwing) provided plenty of variety, especially if you played with a bunch of mates. I especially liked the BMX event, which allowed me to do tricks that in the real world would have resulted in a lengthy spell in a wheelchair.
But what really gives me a nostalgic tear in the eye is the box art of the early games. Take a look at this one, for World Soccer.
Here we see a disembodied leg, perhaps a distant relation of Thing from the Addams Family, trap the ball with no shortage of skill. The game itself was pretty limited: you could only play one-off games from two of eight teams (from memory: Great Britain (!), France, Germany, Italy, USA, Japan, Brazil and Argentina - spot the two put in for marketing purposes) or have a penalty shoot-out. Still, hours of fun at the time, especially when you pulled off a goal from an overhead kick.
The packaging on these early games was a long shot from the mess of images you get now. On the back, you'd have two screenshots and a brief description of the game. Essentially, you were taking a chance with your money and it wasn't until the 1990s rolled around and stuff like Sonic the Hedgehog put the kitchen sink on the box that it changed. All the same, it has a certain comforting uniformity about it - as I get when I hear that little jingle you got when you fired the console up.
I never moved on to the Master System's successor, the Mega Drive. I lost interest in gaming outside the Championship Manager series (an addiction to which doubtless left my friends and I with no time to do much else anyways) until I went to university and discovered the wonders of Playstation. All the same, the old girl lies in a bag under my bed, almost tempting me to fire it up one more time. Or I would, if the damn controller wasn't knackered...
*A few months ago, our mothers met in our hometown and the news was passed to me that he was living in Kidderminster, had recently got married and was expecting to become a father. That made me feel old.
Monday, 23 April 2012
Happy 30th, Spec-Chums!
Apparently it's St George's Day today, but I couldn't give a toss about that. A far more important milestone is that this is the 30th anniversary of the ZX Spectrum hitting the public.
Uncle Clive Sinclair's finest moment helped bring gaming to a wider audience, thanks to his policy of making it affordable to normal folk. I remember we had one at school, an old 48k with the (in)famous rubber keys, and I was smitten. The time of the week we were allowed to mess about on it was always cherished by me and one of the happiest days of my childhood was when I got my own Speccy for Christmas.
So, in tribute to Sir Clive and the little bit of microchips and plastic that started me on a journey that led to terminal disillusionment at the end of Mass Effect 3 (yes, I'm still annoyed), here's my five favourite titles on my initial burst into the wonderful world of gaming.
1. Skool Daze/Back to Skool
Seminal in every word games where you played Eric, a young miscreant who needed to swipe his somewhat negative school report before it made it back home - resulting in a severe thrashing from dad, I expect.
But apart from that, you had to attend lessons, sit quiet during assembly and dodge a good kicking from the school bully. And if you did take a punch, you could always take it out on the local swot, who would always answer every questions the teachers posed.
Both games were pretty much the same, though the sequel had the added bonus of putting a girl's school next door, from which you could charm a young lady into doing your lines for you.
Brilliantly, you could also rename all the characters, so that you could have revenge on that dickhead at school who called you names, as well as make Eric's girlfriend that wee lassie you had a crush on. Wither you now, Kelly Atkinson?
2. Boulder Dash
Of course, Manic Miner and Jet Set Willy are legendary names in the platform/puzzle genre, but I always preferred this slice of taxing gaming.
The conceit was simple: every level is a cave where there's a time limit to collect the diamonds. But to make things difficult, one wrong move resulted in a big rock landing on the bonce. And that was it, really: like many of the time, it was simple but often infuriatingly difficult. Very, very addictive too.
3. Tracksuit Manager
My brother and I must have bought about 30 different footy manager games between us for the Speccy, but this was always the yardstick. Though Football Manager may be the birth of the genre, this beauty is the point where losing days at a time to a game became all-too-easy.
Rather than putting you in charge of a league team, Tracksuit Manager handed you the reins to that all-too Impossible Job: leading England to international glory. Amazingly for the time, you had about 100 players to choose from, all real-life ones too. In the days where Football Manager 2012 has apparently anybody who ever kicked a ball in its database, this might not seem much, but trust me - the fact you could stick Martin Hodge in goal or Keith Houchen up front was very impressive to us misguided youth of the time.
After working your way through qualification and the odd tour of the South Pacific (as I would always arrange, for some reason), there was the drama of the World Cup or European Championships. The tension generated when putting your troops against the likes of Diego Maradona and Ruud Guillit could have been cut with a knife.
4. Daley Thompson's Super Test
Superior joystick waggler in that it give you a wide range of sports to compete in - from the more obvious sprinting and cycling to more skill-related gigs as ski-jump and, err, pistol shooting.
Daley's stock was at an all-time high, given he'd won Gold in LA the year before, which saw this game's prequel, Daley Thompson's Decathlon, knacker more young male wrists than a subscription to Mayfair. Super Test provided many hours of fun for this young gamer,
Best of all, as well as a somewhat moving version of the theme from Chariots of Fire, it didn't have that impossible bastard High Jump event that its predecessor had.
5.Mercenary
The road to Grand Theft Auto begins here, methinks, with this sandbox-style game even receiving a 99% score in Your Sinclair.
And quite right too. Mercenary saw you play the titular role of a bod trapped on a war-ravaged planet after their spaceship elected to stop working. The plot was simple: earn enough cash to get it fixed up by working for one or both of the factions scrapping for control. You had the whole planet to explore and huge underground complexes. Miles ahead of it's time, it also spawned a couple of decent sequels a few years later for the Amiga.
Uncle Clive Sinclair's finest moment helped bring gaming to a wider audience, thanks to his policy of making it affordable to normal folk. I remember we had one at school, an old 48k with the (in)famous rubber keys, and I was smitten. The time of the week we were allowed to mess about on it was always cherished by me and one of the happiest days of my childhood was when I got my own Speccy for Christmas.
So, in tribute to Sir Clive and the little bit of microchips and plastic that started me on a journey that led to terminal disillusionment at the end of Mass Effect 3 (yes, I'm still annoyed), here's my five favourite titles on my initial burst into the wonderful world of gaming.
1. Skool Daze/Back to Skool
Seminal in every word games where you played Eric, a young miscreant who needed to swipe his somewhat negative school report before it made it back home - resulting in a severe thrashing from dad, I expect.
But apart from that, you had to attend lessons, sit quiet during assembly and dodge a good kicking from the school bully. And if you did take a punch, you could always take it out on the local swot, who would always answer every questions the teachers posed.
Both games were pretty much the same, though the sequel had the added bonus of putting a girl's school next door, from which you could charm a young lady into doing your lines for you.
Brilliantly, you could also rename all the characters, so that you could have revenge on that dickhead at school who called you names, as well as make Eric's girlfriend that wee lassie you had a crush on. Wither you now, Kelly Atkinson?
 |
| Rumbled! |
Of course, Manic Miner and Jet Set Willy are legendary names in the platform/puzzle genre, but I always preferred this slice of taxing gaming.
The conceit was simple: every level is a cave where there's a time limit to collect the diamonds. But to make things difficult, one wrong move resulted in a big rock landing on the bonce. And that was it, really: like many of the time, it was simple but often infuriatingly difficult. Very, very addictive too.
3. Tracksuit Manager
My brother and I must have bought about 30 different footy manager games between us for the Speccy, but this was always the yardstick. Though Football Manager may be the birth of the genre, this beauty is the point where losing days at a time to a game became all-too-easy.
Rather than putting you in charge of a league team, Tracksuit Manager handed you the reins to that all-too Impossible Job: leading England to international glory. Amazingly for the time, you had about 100 players to choose from, all real-life ones too. In the days where Football Manager 2012 has apparently anybody who ever kicked a ball in its database, this might not seem much, but trust me - the fact you could stick Martin Hodge in goal or Keith Houchen up front was very impressive to us misguided youth of the time.
After working your way through qualification and the odd tour of the South Pacific (as I would always arrange, for some reason), there was the drama of the World Cup or European Championships. The tension generated when putting your troops against the likes of Diego Maradona and Ruud Guillit could have been cut with a knife.
 |
| Rare high drama, Spectrum style |
Superior joystick waggler in that it give you a wide range of sports to compete in - from the more obvious sprinting and cycling to more skill-related gigs as ski-jump and, err, pistol shooting.
Daley's stock was at an all-time high, given he'd won Gold in LA the year before, which saw this game's prequel, Daley Thompson's Decathlon, knacker more young male wrists than a subscription to Mayfair. Super Test provided many hours of fun for this young gamer,
Best of all, as well as a somewhat moving version of the theme from Chariots of Fire, it didn't have that impossible bastard High Jump event that its predecessor had.
5.Mercenary
The road to Grand Theft Auto begins here, methinks, with this sandbox-style game even receiving a 99% score in Your Sinclair.
And quite right too. Mercenary saw you play the titular role of a bod trapped on a war-ravaged planet after their spaceship elected to stop working. The plot was simple: earn enough cash to get it fixed up by working for one or both of the factions scrapping for control. You had the whole planet to explore and huge underground complexes. Miles ahead of it's time, it also spawned a couple of decent sequels a few years later for the Amiga.
 |
| It's better then it looks. |
Friday, 23 March 2012
Space Age Love Story
Forty hours over 13 days: that’s the time I've put into Mass Effect 3. It would have been sooner, if I didn't have to go to work. Bah. At the end of it all, I was left with a tinge of sadness at saying farewell to the characters that I’d worked with and a whole load of other feelings about the ending. I doubt I’ll offer anything new to what has already been said out there, but minor spoilers may abound.
So: over the two previous games, our main man/woman (former in my case) Commander Shepard has been busy trying to warn everyone that a bunch of rather nasty bods called the Reapers are on their way with the express intention of wiping out all intelligent life in the galaxy, as they apparently do every 50,000 years or so. This is obviously A Very Bad Thing, and something Shep cannot emphasise enough. In response, he’s treated as being like those maniacs you see in city centres carrying a sign saying “THE END IS NIGH”.
When we get started, we’re on Earth – called to explain our lunatic ramblings. Naturally, the bad guys suddenly turn up without as much a phonecall of warning and proceed to bomb seven shades of shite out of Vancouver. One sharpish exit stage left later, and we’re left with the job of essentially nagging the rest of the universe into getting their arses in gear to prevent mass extinction. Not something you’d have thought they’d need much persuasion about, but politics is politics, and our orders are to shake some action and get everyone onside.
Most of the various people from all species that we came across previously are back, assuming you didn't let them get killed. Because I’m ace (ahem), I made it through the “Suicide Mission” at the end of Mass Effect 2 with a full complement still breathing. Therefore, they all rocked up here, though I somehow managed to completely miss Kasumi. Doh.
As per with these games, the voice acting is top notch. Martin Sheen is back and the characters of Hackett and Anderson are made sheer bad-ass by sheer virtue of being voiced by Lance Henrikson and Keith David, the former’s character despite having the same name as someone from prog-rock bores Genesis. Most notable of the newcomers is Freddie Prinze Jnr, who offers his, erm, voice talents to Lt. Vega, a chap apparently made entirely of muscle. Interestingly, the alien race who copped for it last time the Reapers rolled into town have Jamaican accents and in an inversion of stereotype, the one who can join the squad (if you bought the Collector’s Edition or coughed up extra for his Downloadable Content) is a real hardcore type who’s known nothing but war and loss. No jamming with Bob for him.
The game itself: no real major changes from ME2, just a few tweaks. Diving between cover is handy for getting better angles for shots, especially when the more-brainy mooks start lobbing grenades at you, and the new melee attack is very handy and enjoyable to use. The mining section of the prequel has been streamlined, which is good, and the way you pick up side-quests by essentially nosing in on other people’s conversations somehow works, even if sometimes you rush past someone and only hear a few words before the quest pops up in your journal.
There’s some annoying bugs in the cut scenes: a couple of times, my man’s head spun like he was possessed by the devil and in others, his eyes bulged out to the degree that I thought Marty Feldman had been raised from the dead. Bizarre stuff.
For me, and I’d think a lot of people, we’re mainly here for the story. In most aspects, we get the quality we expect. The first visit to the centre of galactic government sees leaders reluctant to help out, oblivious to the scale of the threat – nice parallels to the 1930s, there. I also got a warm feeling when old friends turned up – especially Mordin, Jack and Tali, who turned out to look nothing like I expected under that mask. The Shepard I played as showed plenty of signs of the immense stress he was put under, being charged with saving everyone everywhere. You’d need more than a few Yoga sessions to deal with that kind of pressure, I’d expect, and his nightmares of those he couldn't save gave him a nice sense of depth and development.
Which brings us, inevitably, to the ending. By accident I’d already kind of spoiled it for myself by catching sight of a headline on a news feed that said “Mass Effect 3 Gamers Protest Ending” or something. Having now played it for myself… I see their point. It’s a damp squib of an ending that doesn't tell us anything, probably leaves us with more questions and essentially ensures all the choices we've made over the past two or three games were pretty much irrelevant. We get some vague explanation of why the Reapers do what they do – which wasn't “for the lolz” as I thought it might be.
On a positive, Buzz Aldrin makes a cameo, which was pretty cool – after all, for all our whizzing around space in a gameworld, he’s a dude that’s done it for real and walked on the moon.
My main qualm was the lack of any epilogues of sorts to show us how everyone got on after we’re done with them. The actual fate of Shepard I can deal with, it’s the other people I want to see, like did Tali get her house on her homeworld? And on the topic of her, I didn't feel the whole romance sub-plot got a proper resolution either. How does Vega get on in N7? It’s as if Bioware can only end a game on a cliffhanger rather then a true resolution. While the Metal Gear Solid series lacked Mass Effect’s level of immersion, it did end the whole storyline with the feeling that just about all loose ends were tied up: we knew who lived or died and what the future held for those still with us. Except Nastasha. I missed her sexy, three-packs-a-day voice in MGS2 and 4.
Of course, the more ambiguous/rubbish (delete as applicable) ending for the Mass Effect trilogy may well be because it’s not over after all. I fully expect some DLC* in a few months (weeks?) that will offer to tie up loose ends in exchange for a few more of my pounds. That kind of thing is enough to piss anyone off, and it appears to have done so to a lot of folk out there. Did it leave me feeling cheated? A bit. Put it this way, I ran through ME2 twice in quick order to explore the choices. I’m very reluctant to play through this one again at the moment. Except that I do have that ME2 file where I made a lot of opposite choices, so it'd be interesting to see how that makes things different...
If/when the new content comes out (and on previous form, there will probably be three or four of these), I actually hope they don’t change the actual ending. Yes, it wasn't what a lot of people wanted or expected. But there you go: epic fail for Bioware/EA, but one they can perhaps learn from, rather than try to rewrite to please daft fuckers like me.
*Which reminds me that there’s another DLC for Dragon Age II that I’ll end up buying now I've finished with Mass Effect 3. I really am a complete fucking mug.
So: over the two previous games, our main man/woman (former in my case) Commander Shepard has been busy trying to warn everyone that a bunch of rather nasty bods called the Reapers are on their way with the express intention of wiping out all intelligent life in the galaxy, as they apparently do every 50,000 years or so. This is obviously A Very Bad Thing, and something Shep cannot emphasise enough. In response, he’s treated as being like those maniacs you see in city centres carrying a sign saying “THE END IS NIGH”.
When we get started, we’re on Earth – called to explain our lunatic ramblings. Naturally, the bad guys suddenly turn up without as much a phonecall of warning and proceed to bomb seven shades of shite out of Vancouver. One sharpish exit stage left later, and we’re left with the job of essentially nagging the rest of the universe into getting their arses in gear to prevent mass extinction. Not something you’d have thought they’d need much persuasion about, but politics is politics, and our orders are to shake some action and get everyone onside.
Most of the various people from all species that we came across previously are back, assuming you didn't let them get killed. Because I’m ace (ahem), I made it through the “Suicide Mission” at the end of Mass Effect 2 with a full complement still breathing. Therefore, they all rocked up here, though I somehow managed to completely miss Kasumi. Doh.
As per with these games, the voice acting is top notch. Martin Sheen is back and the characters of Hackett and Anderson are made sheer bad-ass by sheer virtue of being voiced by Lance Henrikson and Keith David, the former’s character despite having the same name as someone from prog-rock bores Genesis. Most notable of the newcomers is Freddie Prinze Jnr, who offers his, erm, voice talents to Lt. Vega, a chap apparently made entirely of muscle. Interestingly, the alien race who copped for it last time the Reapers rolled into town have Jamaican accents and in an inversion of stereotype, the one who can join the squad (if you bought the Collector’s Edition or coughed up extra for his Downloadable Content) is a real hardcore type who’s known nothing but war and loss. No jamming with Bob for him.
The game itself: no real major changes from ME2, just a few tweaks. Diving between cover is handy for getting better angles for shots, especially when the more-brainy mooks start lobbing grenades at you, and the new melee attack is very handy and enjoyable to use. The mining section of the prequel has been streamlined, which is good, and the way you pick up side-quests by essentially nosing in on other people’s conversations somehow works, even if sometimes you rush past someone and only hear a few words before the quest pops up in your journal.
There’s some annoying bugs in the cut scenes: a couple of times, my man’s head spun like he was possessed by the devil and in others, his eyes bulged out to the degree that I thought Marty Feldman had been raised from the dead. Bizarre stuff.
For me, and I’d think a lot of people, we’re mainly here for the story. In most aspects, we get the quality we expect. The first visit to the centre of galactic government sees leaders reluctant to help out, oblivious to the scale of the threat – nice parallels to the 1930s, there. I also got a warm feeling when old friends turned up – especially Mordin, Jack and Tali, who turned out to look nothing like I expected under that mask. The Shepard I played as showed plenty of signs of the immense stress he was put under, being charged with saving everyone everywhere. You’d need more than a few Yoga sessions to deal with that kind of pressure, I’d expect, and his nightmares of those he couldn't save gave him a nice sense of depth and development.
Which brings us, inevitably, to the ending. By accident I’d already kind of spoiled it for myself by catching sight of a headline on a news feed that said “Mass Effect 3 Gamers Protest Ending” or something. Having now played it for myself… I see their point. It’s a damp squib of an ending that doesn't tell us anything, probably leaves us with more questions and essentially ensures all the choices we've made over the past two or three games were pretty much irrelevant. We get some vague explanation of why the Reapers do what they do – which wasn't “for the lolz” as I thought it might be.
On a positive, Buzz Aldrin makes a cameo, which was pretty cool – after all, for all our whizzing around space in a gameworld, he’s a dude that’s done it for real and walked on the moon.
My main qualm was the lack of any epilogues of sorts to show us how everyone got on after we’re done with them. The actual fate of Shepard I can deal with, it’s the other people I want to see, like did Tali get her house on her homeworld? And on the topic of her, I didn't feel the whole romance sub-plot got a proper resolution either. How does Vega get on in N7? It’s as if Bioware can only end a game on a cliffhanger rather then a true resolution. While the Metal Gear Solid series lacked Mass Effect’s level of immersion, it did end the whole storyline with the feeling that just about all loose ends were tied up: we knew who lived or died and what the future held for those still with us. Except Nastasha. I missed her sexy, three-packs-a-day voice in MGS2 and 4.
Of course, the more ambiguous/rubbish (delete as applicable) ending for the Mass Effect trilogy may well be because it’s not over after all. I fully expect some DLC* in a few months (weeks?) that will offer to tie up loose ends in exchange for a few more of my pounds. That kind of thing is enough to piss anyone off, and it appears to have done so to a lot of folk out there. Did it leave me feeling cheated? A bit. Put it this way, I ran through ME2 twice in quick order to explore the choices. I’m very reluctant to play through this one again at the moment. Except that I do have that ME2 file where I made a lot of opposite choices, so it'd be interesting to see how that makes things different...
If/when the new content comes out (and on previous form, there will probably be three or four of these), I actually hope they don’t change the actual ending. Yes, it wasn't what a lot of people wanted or expected. But there you go: epic fail for Bioware/EA, but one they can perhaps learn from, rather than try to rewrite to please daft fuckers like me.
*Which reminds me that there’s another DLC for Dragon Age II that I’ll end up buying now I've finished with Mass Effect 3. I really am a complete fucking mug.
Sunday, 19 February 2012
The Day The Rain Came Down
I've been putting off playing Heavy Rain for some time, perhaps in part to it being by the same team that made Fahrenheit on the Playstation 2. That was a game that started with an intriguing premise (man has murdered random stranger but has no recollection of why) before descending into a plot that could be best described as "batshit insane".
That may explain why now, in 2012, I'm writing about a game that came out in 2010. But, hey, you can probably pick it up for a tenner now, which I'll say now is about the correct price for a game that doesn't bear repeat plays. More on that later.
Back to my original point, I was concerned Heavy Rain would go the same route as Fahrenheit, being as just about the core of it followed similar lines: you play a number of people brought together by unfortunate events and by "play", we mean do the odd dialogue choice in between mashing the buttons in quicktime events.
Hardly riveting gaming, then, but the whole point of these gigs is the story. Which goes something like this: Ethan Mars is living an idyllic life, with success as an architect, a loving wife and two sons. Naturally, it all goes completely to shit very early in the game and an unfortunate event sees him spend time in a coma, coming out with a nasty case of black outs and terror of being in crowds. In fact, the game could well be sub-titled "The Increasingly Shit Life of Ethan Mars", such are the horrors inflicted on him, which may well delight sadistic gamers.
While Ethan is struggling with this and major-league domestic problems, some nasty little fucker is going around grabbing wee laddies off the street and drowning them in rainwater, leaving origami figures on the dumped bodies. Investigating these are FBI agent/drug addict Norman (yes, really) Jayden and stereotypical private eye Scott Shelby, which is just as well for Ethan as his youngest son winds up being the latest victim and time is running out before the poor mite drowns. Insomniac journalist Madison Paige, whose digitised nipples are there to be perved on if wished, also winds up involved with Ethan, offering help and the most implausible romance sub-plot I can remember.
Given the story would appear to be the main area of interest, it does a pretty good job on first playthrough. The identity of the murderer is kept secret till very near the end, which kept me guessing and the twist was indeed very effective in making me go "no fucking way!".
However, and this may be the biggest however I can think of, in the 30 minutes or so after the game ended, tiny plot holes began to grow to the point they were the size of those you see in open cast coal mines. How did the killer afford all the stuff needed to carry out the crimes? How does Shaun survive any length of time in his makeshift cell? And that's just those I can tell without spoiling the story.
Worse still, the game has little/no replay value because all that you can change is who makes it to the end alive. If, like me, you seemed to have got the "best" conclusion (i.e. everyone lives, psycho killer turned into mince), then going through again seems a tad pointless. It would have been very cool if there were two or three other suspects to provide a different finale.
On other points, the game does look great. The constant rainfall certainly adds a dark gloom to events, aided and abetted in style by a great music score, though the voice-acting stays around the average-at-best mark.
As a potential look into the future of film-making or video games, Heavy Rain falls short. What it does work as is a decent thriller/murder mystery that can fill up ten or so hours of your time, but no more.
That may explain why now, in 2012, I'm writing about a game that came out in 2010. But, hey, you can probably pick it up for a tenner now, which I'll say now is about the correct price for a game that doesn't bear repeat plays. More on that later.
Back to my original point, I was concerned Heavy Rain would go the same route as Fahrenheit, being as just about the core of it followed similar lines: you play a number of people brought together by unfortunate events and by "play", we mean do the odd dialogue choice in between mashing the buttons in quicktime events.
Hardly riveting gaming, then, but the whole point of these gigs is the story. Which goes something like this: Ethan Mars is living an idyllic life, with success as an architect, a loving wife and two sons. Naturally, it all goes completely to shit very early in the game and an unfortunate event sees him spend time in a coma, coming out with a nasty case of black outs and terror of being in crowds. In fact, the game could well be sub-titled "The Increasingly Shit Life of Ethan Mars", such are the horrors inflicted on him, which may well delight sadistic gamers.
While Ethan is struggling with this and major-league domestic problems, some nasty little fucker is going around grabbing wee laddies off the street and drowning them in rainwater, leaving origami figures on the dumped bodies. Investigating these are FBI agent/drug addict Norman (yes, really) Jayden and stereotypical private eye Scott Shelby, which is just as well for Ethan as his youngest son winds up being the latest victim and time is running out before the poor mite drowns. Insomniac journalist Madison Paige, whose digitised nipples are there to be perved on if wished, also winds up involved with Ethan, offering help and the most implausible romance sub-plot I can remember.
Given the story would appear to be the main area of interest, it does a pretty good job on first playthrough. The identity of the murderer is kept secret till very near the end, which kept me guessing and the twist was indeed very effective in making me go "no fucking way!".
However, and this may be the biggest however I can think of, in the 30 minutes or so after the game ended, tiny plot holes began to grow to the point they were the size of those you see in open cast coal mines. How did the killer afford all the stuff needed to carry out the crimes? How does Shaun survive any length of time in his makeshift cell? And that's just those I can tell without spoiling the story.
Worse still, the game has little/no replay value because all that you can change is who makes it to the end alive. If, like me, you seemed to have got the "best" conclusion (i.e. everyone lives, psycho killer turned into mince), then going through again seems a tad pointless. It would have been very cool if there were two or three other suspects to provide a different finale.
On other points, the game does look great. The constant rainfall certainly adds a dark gloom to events, aided and abetted in style by a great music score, though the voice-acting stays around the average-at-best mark.
As a potential look into the future of film-making or video games, Heavy Rain falls short. What it does work as is a decent thriller/murder mystery that can fill up ten or so hours of your time, but no more.
Friday, 16 December 2011
Where Do The Hours Go?
I've been holding back on reviewing Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim for the simple reason that it’s a game that you can’t appreciate until you've put some time in. So that’s what I've done: 70 hours and counting.
Yes, 70 hours, and that’s before I’m anywhere close to finishing it. In fact, I’m still not even sure what the actual ‘aim’ of the game is, as I've spent so long wandering around the somewhat huge world doing odd jobs and killing wildlife for kicks.
Like it’s predecessor, Oblivion, Skyrim sees you start out in a bit of trouble. But while the past instalment saw you locked up before Jean-Luc Picard helped out, we’re in worse straits here. In fact, the opening sees you minutes away from being given a severe haircut with a large axe. Luckily, for you, a dragon then appears to provide a helpful distraction, allowing you to escape while the town and its people are incinerated.
With that, it’s into the world and as has been noted by many others, it’s an incredible one to look at. Walking along, you spot a stunning snow topped mountain in the distance: whereas in the past it would be a forever distant bit of backdrop, in Skyrim you can wander up there and do a bit of fell walking, though you may want to be armed first as all manner of wolves, bears and bandits won’t think twice of leaving you dead by the roadside.
Though I've not engaged too much with it so far, the general jist of the story is cut between two issues: one is a brewing civil war between the powerful Empire and a ‘Nord’ splinter group that wants independence for Skyrim. Though I've managed to avoid it thus far, I’m under the impression I’ll have to take sides on this one eventually. Secondly, there’s small matter of big-fuck-off dragons swooping around and we all know that swooping is bad. By chance (ahem), we discover early on that we are ‘dragonborn’, making us very good at killing the ugly buggers and absorbing their souls.
This is quite useful, as doing so allows you to unlock the power of your voice, meaning a mere shout can unleash a fireball in the direction of anyone you don’t like. Must make domestic arguments (yes, you can get hitched) pretty unfortunate.
I’m fully aware all of this must sound horrifically boring to anyone with no interest in games. Indeed, I can state the evidence of one person who’s seen me playing this game on a few occasions and rolled their eyes so much I wonder if they've been possessed. Additionally, the medieval setting wouldn't normally be my bag either – I much prefer the post-apocalypse setting of Fallout, made by the same company.
But, and this is a huge but, the vibe of the game more than compensates for any lack of interest in the setting. By allowing you to improve your skills through practise, you feel your ability to do things rise in a satisfying way. If you like to go charging into battle, waving your sword and shield, then your skills in those areas will go up. Personally, my character is more a ninja-esque dude prone to sticking an arrow in someone's head from distance, but also good enough waving a massive fuck-off axe for when things get personal.
It's this kind of plus that makes Skyrim so essential despite the minor flaws - some of which will be fixed once I download the patch - like certain missions not allowing a huge amount of scope for options. No matter: I'd recommend it to any seasoned gamer, as long as they don't mind potentially losing their job, relationship, all vestiges of a life...
Yes, 70 hours, and that’s before I’m anywhere close to finishing it. In fact, I’m still not even sure what the actual ‘aim’ of the game is, as I've spent so long wandering around the somewhat huge world doing odd jobs and killing wildlife for kicks.
Like it’s predecessor, Oblivion, Skyrim sees you start out in a bit of trouble. But while the past instalment saw you locked up before Jean-Luc Picard helped out, we’re in worse straits here. In fact, the opening sees you minutes away from being given a severe haircut with a large axe. Luckily, for you, a dragon then appears to provide a helpful distraction, allowing you to escape while the town and its people are incinerated.
With that, it’s into the world and as has been noted by many others, it’s an incredible one to look at. Walking along, you spot a stunning snow topped mountain in the distance: whereas in the past it would be a forever distant bit of backdrop, in Skyrim you can wander up there and do a bit of fell walking, though you may want to be armed first as all manner of wolves, bears and bandits won’t think twice of leaving you dead by the roadside.
Though I've not engaged too much with it so far, the general jist of the story is cut between two issues: one is a brewing civil war between the powerful Empire and a ‘Nord’ splinter group that wants independence for Skyrim. Though I've managed to avoid it thus far, I’m under the impression I’ll have to take sides on this one eventually. Secondly, there’s small matter of big-fuck-off dragons swooping around and we all know that swooping is bad. By chance (ahem), we discover early on that we are ‘dragonborn’, making us very good at killing the ugly buggers and absorbing their souls.
This is quite useful, as doing so allows you to unlock the power of your voice, meaning a mere shout can unleash a fireball in the direction of anyone you don’t like. Must make domestic arguments (yes, you can get hitched) pretty unfortunate.
I’m fully aware all of this must sound horrifically boring to anyone with no interest in games. Indeed, I can state the evidence of one person who’s seen me playing this game on a few occasions and rolled their eyes so much I wonder if they've been possessed. Additionally, the medieval setting wouldn't normally be my bag either – I much prefer the post-apocalypse setting of Fallout, made by the same company.
But, and this is a huge but, the vibe of the game more than compensates for any lack of interest in the setting. By allowing you to improve your skills through practise, you feel your ability to do things rise in a satisfying way. If you like to go charging into battle, waving your sword and shield, then your skills in those areas will go up. Personally, my character is more a ninja-esque dude prone to sticking an arrow in someone's head from distance, but also good enough waving a massive fuck-off axe for when things get personal.
It's this kind of plus that makes Skyrim so essential despite the minor flaws - some of which will be fixed once I download the patch - like certain missions not allowing a huge amount of scope for options. No matter: I'd recommend it to any seasoned gamer, as long as they don't mind potentially losing their job, relationship, all vestiges of a life...
Thursday, 17 November 2011
Game For An Idea
I had the misfortune the other week to watch the Max Payne film, living out a peculiar kind of self-masochism by seeing it out till the end. For those who don’t know, it was originally a video game from a decade ago that wasn't too bad. Though the storyline was clichéd beyond belief at times (man loses wife and child, goes mad, discovers huge conspiracy, goes madder still) the gunplay was fun.
On film, however, it doesn't work. You feel detached from the action and matters aren't helped by the fact that Mark Wahlberg isn't really much of an actor. It’s not the first to fall flat either. Quite how anyone thought Super Mario Bros would work as a film is beyond my ken and the end result would suggest everyone involved was equally confused. Same goes for the Street Fighter effort, which wasn't helped by having actors of the pedigree of Jean-Claude Van Damme and Kylie Minogue trying to lift it out of the mire – though I remember seeing an Anime version that took a totally different approach to much more impressive returns.
As an action film, Hitman works fairly well. From the perspective of someone who loved the games, it doesn't, as we despair that Agent 47 engages in shoot outs rather than use stealth. And herein lies the rub: gamers dismiss the film as crap because it’s not like the source material, everyone else has no emotional connection with the characters. No matter – as long as video games are making money, there will always be some lazy arse in the film industry with no decent original ideas who’ll snap up the rights. But wither the Metal Gear game?
From the opposite angle, the film-to-game route is nearly as old as video games themselves. Indeed, when I got my first computer, a much-beloved Sinclair +2 (128k of memory!), it came with a bundle of games called “Screen Heroes”, which was actually mainly dubious versions of TV shows: Miami Vice, Street Hawk and Knight Rider, I recall. But alongside the legendary Daley Thompson’s Super Test and the most baffling game of all time, Frankie Goes to Hollywood, was an incredibly average fighting game built around the-then contemporary Highlander film.
Mercifully, the limits of technology spared us the paradox of a Frenchman playing a Scotsman and a Scotsman playing a Spaniard and instead offered the chance to shuffle around in 2D trying to cut some guy’s head off. But this and others like it set the tone of buying up the license to a current hit film and slapping any old tosh out to try and cash in. One somewhat desperate example was a game for Moore-era Bond flick The Spy Who Loved Me being put out over a decade after the fact. Maybe the rights were going for 20p and they needed a title for a mediocre shooter.
Around the end of the last decade, games seemed to be trying with all they had to actually be something they weren't. The term “interactive movie” was bandied around like Billy-o and the Wing Commander series (itself turned into a wretched film) was a forerunner to this. Entering the world in the early 90s, it gave us very enjoyable space shooters with (for the time) a strong storyline and characters. The first two instalments rank up there with some of the best gaming experiences I've had, and then number III came along. Mark Hammill, Malcolm McDowell, John Rhys-Davies and Thomas F Wilson (Biff to you) stood in front of a load of blue screen and tried to keep straight faces, seemingly swallowing up the entire budget in the process, judging by the quality of the actual parts where you had something to do.
Thankfully, we seem to have dropped that particular craze and settled instead for just using the voices of famous thespians, which seems to be a better way of working. Though the technology used in LA Noire, where the actor’s facial movements are recorded may yet have some legs, even if the expressions used by someone who is lying don’t need the skills of Derren Brown to work out. More on that title when I complete it.
To conclude: games are games, films are films, and let’s not try to get them all mixed up. Hollywood, use your noggins and come up with new concepts. That said, I happen to know of one obscure game from the early 90s that I reckon could make for a great film. If any big shot producers want to throw me fifty grand, I reckon I could knock out a script in a couple of months…
On film, however, it doesn't work. You feel detached from the action and matters aren't helped by the fact that Mark Wahlberg isn't really much of an actor. It’s not the first to fall flat either. Quite how anyone thought Super Mario Bros would work as a film is beyond my ken and the end result would suggest everyone involved was equally confused. Same goes for the Street Fighter effort, which wasn't helped by having actors of the pedigree of Jean-Claude Van Damme and Kylie Minogue trying to lift it out of the mire – though I remember seeing an Anime version that took a totally different approach to much more impressive returns.
As an action film, Hitman works fairly well. From the perspective of someone who loved the games, it doesn't, as we despair that Agent 47 engages in shoot outs rather than use stealth. And herein lies the rub: gamers dismiss the film as crap because it’s not like the source material, everyone else has no emotional connection with the characters. No matter – as long as video games are making money, there will always be some lazy arse in the film industry with no decent original ideas who’ll snap up the rights. But wither the Metal Gear game?
From the opposite angle, the film-to-game route is nearly as old as video games themselves. Indeed, when I got my first computer, a much-beloved Sinclair +2 (128k of memory!), it came with a bundle of games called “Screen Heroes”, which was actually mainly dubious versions of TV shows: Miami Vice, Street Hawk and Knight Rider, I recall. But alongside the legendary Daley Thompson’s Super Test and the most baffling game of all time, Frankie Goes to Hollywood, was an incredibly average fighting game built around the-then contemporary Highlander film.
Mercifully, the limits of technology spared us the paradox of a Frenchman playing a Scotsman and a Scotsman playing a Spaniard and instead offered the chance to shuffle around in 2D trying to cut some guy’s head off. But this and others like it set the tone of buying up the license to a current hit film and slapping any old tosh out to try and cash in. One somewhat desperate example was a game for Moore-era Bond flick The Spy Who Loved Me being put out over a decade after the fact. Maybe the rights were going for 20p and they needed a title for a mediocre shooter.
Around the end of the last decade, games seemed to be trying with all they had to actually be something they weren't. The term “interactive movie” was bandied around like Billy-o and the Wing Commander series (itself turned into a wretched film) was a forerunner to this. Entering the world in the early 90s, it gave us very enjoyable space shooters with (for the time) a strong storyline and characters. The first two instalments rank up there with some of the best gaming experiences I've had, and then number III came along. Mark Hammill, Malcolm McDowell, John Rhys-Davies and Thomas F Wilson (Biff to you) stood in front of a load of blue screen and tried to keep straight faces, seemingly swallowing up the entire budget in the process, judging by the quality of the actual parts where you had something to do.
Thankfully, we seem to have dropped that particular craze and settled instead for just using the voices of famous thespians, which seems to be a better way of working. Though the technology used in LA Noire, where the actor’s facial movements are recorded may yet have some legs, even if the expressions used by someone who is lying don’t need the skills of Derren Brown to work out. More on that title when I complete it.
To conclude: games are games, films are films, and let’s not try to get them all mixed up. Hollywood, use your noggins and come up with new concepts. That said, I happen to know of one obscure game from the early 90s that I reckon could make for a great film. If any big shot producers want to throw me fifty grand, I reckon I could knock out a script in a couple of months…
Monday, 26 September 2011
Love (and Guns) From Outta Space
OK, yes, this is a review of Mass Effect 2, which is already a year old, so 0/10 for timeliness. But I only just got round to buying it. Why? Well, for one thing, the first game never appeared on the PS3, so the idea of jumping into a universe I had no clue about didn't appeal too much. Plus being the tightarse I am, I elected to wait till the price dropped below the £20 barrier. With that all-important barrier passed and with nothing else catching my eye, I decided to give my sci-fi bone a tickle.
Somewhat mercifully, the PS3 package contains a code to allow access to the vast majority of downloadable content for free, with a couple of extra characters and missions thrown in. We also get a comic book of sorts that whizzes through the events of the first game, allowing you to decide which way you swayed on the big decisions, namely who lived or died and the all-important matter of whose kex you managed to get into.
Before we get to do this, there’s the small matter of our hero, Commander Shepard, being dead, which really puts a damper on their day. Or on their two years, as it turns out, as the corpse is subsequently grabbed by Cerebus, an extreme pro-humanity group who are kind of like a space age National Front. But it’s not all bad, as their big cheese has the same voice as, and looks like, President Bartlett.
Brought back to life by means explained with little more than a hand wave, we’re given the job of saving the galaxy. Again. And the odds of survival are pretty much nil. Again. But first we must assemble a team of disparate characters who must overcome their prejudices and rivalries against each other if they’re to stand any chance of survival. Again.
You get the idea. As a basic storyline, it’s clichéd beyond belief yet I still found myself hugely engaged with what was presented to me. It helps that it looks great, of course, and when you have a top notch acting cast including Martin Sheen, Seth Green and Keith David, you’re always going to pay attention to what’s being said to you. Not quite enough of Keith David for me, though, because you can never have enough of that guy in your video game.
Developers BioWare were also behind the Dragon Age games which found a lot favour with this gamer (a big factor in my finally buying ME2), and their skill at character development carries over here, though not quite to the same level. Characters tend to have little to say outside their own recruitment mission and a later episode where you can try to win their loyalty - or not, if you feel like being a bit of a bastard about matters. This is a bit of a shame, as I was really keen to find out more about Garrus, whose kick-arse manner made him a regular member of my team.
So, looks great, sounds great. Now the catch: a large part of playing Mass Effect 2 involves running around shooting things. Fair enough, but the way this happens (essentially, hiding behind a wall and jumping out to crack off a few rounds) gets very repetitive very quickly. It’s not helped by the battle intelligence of your comrades being a tad limited. While you may show some common sense by staying hidden while under fire from a group of robot killing machines, colleagues may instead decide a Charge Of The Light Brigade tactic is in order, resulting in them needing urgent medical attention soon after.
Regarding these parts of the game, it struck me that it didn't really matter who you took along. It would have been nice for certain situations to be approached differently depending on your squad. All the same, it was always satisfying to ventilate some unaware mook from distance with a sniper rifle.
There’s also the problem of tedious loading times, an issue that comes into play the most when you’re mooching around your spaceship. In principal, this is one of the best parts of game – you can wander round, banter with the crew, flirt with the ladies (or gents, if you play as a female Shepard) and feed the fish in your swanky cabin. All of this is offset with loading that seems to go on for ages as you travel between the four levels. Reminds me of being back on the ZX Spectrum.
Last, the basic "ethical" system of making decisions on being either a "Paragon" or "Renegade" is often too black and white – it works at times and the fact I was extremely annoyed at letting somebody go when it turned out they were a murderer backs this up, but a little more choice would have been nice. Many games use a variation of this these days, from Fallout’s karma meter and Dragon Age’s friend/rival gauges. None of them have really nailed that all-important morally ambiguous area yet.
Flaws aside, ME2 does a great job of creating a top notch atmosphere. As the story progresses towards the conclusion, I found myself wondering how my actions would effect the conclusion. By not gaining the loyalty of Zaeed, a ruthless Merc, was I creating trouble for myself down the line? When the final battle came, the desire to get everyone home made for excellent entertainment. Sadly, I didn't manage it but a casualty rate of one seems a decent return, especially as that person was terminally ill anyways.
To wrap up: the 44 hours I spent on Mass Effect 2 rarely dragged by, the storyline managing to keep me motivated through the combat sections and I’ll probably give it another play-through at some point to try things with a different back story. Doubtless I’ll download the Arrival add-on and I’ll be anticipating Mass Effect 3 to see how Shepard gets on with the consequences of my decisions.
Somewhat mercifully, the PS3 package contains a code to allow access to the vast majority of downloadable content for free, with a couple of extra characters and missions thrown in. We also get a comic book of sorts that whizzes through the events of the first game, allowing you to decide which way you swayed on the big decisions, namely who lived or died and the all-important matter of whose kex you managed to get into.
Before we get to do this, there’s the small matter of our hero, Commander Shepard, being dead, which really puts a damper on their day. Or on their two years, as it turns out, as the corpse is subsequently grabbed by Cerebus, an extreme pro-humanity group who are kind of like a space age National Front. But it’s not all bad, as their big cheese has the same voice as, and looks like, President Bartlett.
Brought back to life by means explained with little more than a hand wave, we’re given the job of saving the galaxy. Again. And the odds of survival are pretty much nil. Again. But first we must assemble a team of disparate characters who must overcome their prejudices and rivalries against each other if they’re to stand any chance of survival. Again.
You get the idea. As a basic storyline, it’s clichéd beyond belief yet I still found myself hugely engaged with what was presented to me. It helps that it looks great, of course, and when you have a top notch acting cast including Martin Sheen, Seth Green and Keith David, you’re always going to pay attention to what’s being said to you. Not quite enough of Keith David for me, though, because you can never have enough of that guy in your video game.
Developers BioWare were also behind the Dragon Age games which found a lot favour with this gamer (a big factor in my finally buying ME2), and their skill at character development carries over here, though not quite to the same level. Characters tend to have little to say outside their own recruitment mission and a later episode where you can try to win their loyalty - or not, if you feel like being a bit of a bastard about matters. This is a bit of a shame, as I was really keen to find out more about Garrus, whose kick-arse manner made him a regular member of my team.
So, looks great, sounds great. Now the catch: a large part of playing Mass Effect 2 involves running around shooting things. Fair enough, but the way this happens (essentially, hiding behind a wall and jumping out to crack off a few rounds) gets very repetitive very quickly. It’s not helped by the battle intelligence of your comrades being a tad limited. While you may show some common sense by staying hidden while under fire from a group of robot killing machines, colleagues may instead decide a Charge Of The Light Brigade tactic is in order, resulting in them needing urgent medical attention soon after.
Regarding these parts of the game, it struck me that it didn't really matter who you took along. It would have been nice for certain situations to be approached differently depending on your squad. All the same, it was always satisfying to ventilate some unaware mook from distance with a sniper rifle.
There’s also the problem of tedious loading times, an issue that comes into play the most when you’re mooching around your spaceship. In principal, this is one of the best parts of game – you can wander round, banter with the crew, flirt with the ladies (or gents, if you play as a female Shepard) and feed the fish in your swanky cabin. All of this is offset with loading that seems to go on for ages as you travel between the four levels. Reminds me of being back on the ZX Spectrum.
Last, the basic "ethical" system of making decisions on being either a "Paragon" or "Renegade" is often too black and white – it works at times and the fact I was extremely annoyed at letting somebody go when it turned out they were a murderer backs this up, but a little more choice would have been nice. Many games use a variation of this these days, from Fallout’s karma meter and Dragon Age’s friend/rival gauges. None of them have really nailed that all-important morally ambiguous area yet.
Flaws aside, ME2 does a great job of creating a top notch atmosphere. As the story progresses towards the conclusion, I found myself wondering how my actions would effect the conclusion. By not gaining the loyalty of Zaeed, a ruthless Merc, was I creating trouble for myself down the line? When the final battle came, the desire to get everyone home made for excellent entertainment. Sadly, I didn't manage it but a casualty rate of one seems a decent return, especially as that person was terminally ill anyways.
To wrap up: the 44 hours I spent on Mass Effect 2 rarely dragged by, the storyline managing to keep me motivated through the combat sections and I’ll probably give it another play-through at some point to try things with a different back story. Doubtless I’ll download the Arrival add-on and I’ll be anticipating Mass Effect 3 to see how Shepard gets on with the consequences of my decisions.
Sunday, 18 September 2011
Muttering Man Machine
On learning that Deux Ex: Human Revolution was out, I had to stretch my memory to remember playing the original Deus Ex on the Playstation 2, some ten years ago. At the time, it was considered revolutionary for combining RPG levelling up/character building with a first-person shooter gameplay style. It's certainly a format that took off.
Over a decade on, the developers are looking to set down a new marker and in terms of looks, they may well have done. DX: HR (as I'm calling it for the purposes of this review) is visually stunning with a great soundtrack to boot - sneaking round the perma-dark streets (hello, Blade Runner), I felt a palpable sense of tension as I tried not to get spotted by tooled up guards and rent-a-cops.
Anyways, set twenty minutes into the future, you play as Adam Jensen who, despite losing his SWAT job due to some unpleasantness on a mission, seems to have it going for him. He's got the gravelly Clint Eastwood voice, has a cool black overcoat and his ex-girlfriend has set him up with a nice gig working in Detroit as Chief of Security at Sarif Industries, one of the prime movers in the new industry of human augmentation - fitting electronic limbs and other upgrades to bods. Sadly, sitting in his office all day watching the security camera in the female dressing room wouldn't make for a good game.
During an attack on his office, he's left in a condition very close to dead. Which is a step better than just about everybody else, it seems, including his ex-girlfriend. Luckily, he must have paid up his company health insurance premiums, as he's put all back together again with the latest tech. But is he now more machine then man? Hmm? And if this does sound a tad familiar, then it is lampshaded very well - listening in to a passing conversation between two cops has one of them mention "this movie from the 80s, about a cop who gets killed and they rebuild him..."
Despite this setback-of-sorts (it's never really explored how Adam feels about being turned into what he becomes), he's soon back to work and out to find out who was responsible for the current situation. Players of the original Deus Ex will not be surprised to find out this involves a mass conspiracy of sorts.
My problem with DX: HR is twofold. First, the boss fights seem against the spirit of the game. If, like me, you play as a sneaky get, avoiding detection and having to kill people, it seems a bit odd to have to suddenly engage in a stand-up firefight against someone who can end your game with a couple of well-placed grenades. It feels like you've suddenly been transported into another game.
It's a shame you have to go through these parts, as using stealth is a lot more fun than engaging every enemy mook you see: the combat doesn't really hold up all that well and becomes just another cover-and-shoot affair that we've seen before.
Secondly, the storyline isn't quite as clever as it thinks it is. There's a couple of 'twists' that came as no surprise whatsoever and I was disappointed that the various decisions I made throughout the game didn't really come into play during the endgame. Indeed, much like the original, your choice of ending is made by a decision at the very end. And anyways, as this is a prequel, we kind of already know what happens in the long run from playing Deus Ex.
Indeed, the mild feeling of anti-climax at the conclusion brought to mind Alpha Protocol, a game which got little attention a couple of years back, and its terrific story (in which decisions throughout led you to one of many endings) hindered by lousy gameplay. I get the impression that if that game had been afforded the budget DX:HR got, it might have been a classic. As we are, DX:HR is a worthy game that doesn't quite fulfill the potential it had but provides a decent 20/30 hours of gameplay with a decent slice of replay value.
Over a decade on, the developers are looking to set down a new marker and in terms of looks, they may well have done. DX: HR (as I'm calling it for the purposes of this review) is visually stunning with a great soundtrack to boot - sneaking round the perma-dark streets (hello, Blade Runner), I felt a palpable sense of tension as I tried not to get spotted by tooled up guards and rent-a-cops.
Anyways, set twenty minutes into the future, you play as Adam Jensen who, despite losing his SWAT job due to some unpleasantness on a mission, seems to have it going for him. He's got the gravelly Clint Eastwood voice, has a cool black overcoat and his ex-girlfriend has set him up with a nice gig working in Detroit as Chief of Security at Sarif Industries, one of the prime movers in the new industry of human augmentation - fitting electronic limbs and other upgrades to bods. Sadly, sitting in his office all day watching the security camera in the female dressing room wouldn't make for a good game.
During an attack on his office, he's left in a condition very close to dead. Which is a step better than just about everybody else, it seems, including his ex-girlfriend. Luckily, he must have paid up his company health insurance premiums, as he's put all back together again with the latest tech. But is he now more machine then man? Hmm? And if this does sound a tad familiar, then it is lampshaded very well - listening in to a passing conversation between two cops has one of them mention "this movie from the 80s, about a cop who gets killed and they rebuild him..."
Despite this setback-of-sorts (it's never really explored how Adam feels about being turned into what he becomes), he's soon back to work and out to find out who was responsible for the current situation. Players of the original Deus Ex will not be surprised to find out this involves a mass conspiracy of sorts.
My problem with DX: HR is twofold. First, the boss fights seem against the spirit of the game. If, like me, you play as a sneaky get, avoiding detection and having to kill people, it seems a bit odd to have to suddenly engage in a stand-up firefight against someone who can end your game with a couple of well-placed grenades. It feels like you've suddenly been transported into another game.
It's a shame you have to go through these parts, as using stealth is a lot more fun than engaging every enemy mook you see: the combat doesn't really hold up all that well and becomes just another cover-and-shoot affair that we've seen before.
Secondly, the storyline isn't quite as clever as it thinks it is. There's a couple of 'twists' that came as no surprise whatsoever and I was disappointed that the various decisions I made throughout the game didn't really come into play during the endgame. Indeed, much like the original, your choice of ending is made by a decision at the very end. And anyways, as this is a prequel, we kind of already know what happens in the long run from playing Deus Ex.
Indeed, the mild feeling of anti-climax at the conclusion brought to mind Alpha Protocol, a game which got little attention a couple of years back, and its terrific story (in which decisions throughout led you to one of many endings) hindered by lousy gameplay. I get the impression that if that game had been afforded the budget DX:HR got, it might have been a classic. As we are, DX:HR is a worthy game that doesn't quite fulfill the potential it had but provides a decent 20/30 hours of gameplay with a decent slice of replay value.
Saturday, 20 August 2011
Expand Your Mind, Retract Your Wallet
I question my sanity sometimes, I really do. A couple of days ago, I stumped up eight quid to buy Dragon Age II: Legacy, an "add-on" to the PS3 title that I reviewed some time ago. Previously, I'd also chucked a fiver the way of Bioware to get The Exiled Prince extra content.
A quick word on Dragon Age II: since I first played it (I'm on my second run through now), I've played the original Dragon Age: Origins and in my mind, the original had a much stronger story and character development. Perhaps having a more clearly defined "big bad" (or bads) from the start helped. The ending of the second game felt a bit tacked on, as if the writers had written themselves into a corner and desperately need an exit plan for the storyline.
To start with The Exiled Prince, I was somewhat annoyed with this one, as it turned out that the Prince in question, Sebastian, is actually pretty fucking vital to the plot development at a crucial point. On my original play, without Seb, the point in question passed with a curious sense of something missing. Now I know what it was. Bit of a rip-off there, lads and lasses.
Not that this is anything new, even to this century. Going back to the early 1990s, I can remember Origin bringing out "Expansion Packs" for their Wing Commander and Strike Commander games. I was lucky enough to find the versions that bunged in all the content into one handy package (as I did with Dragon Age: Origins), but it's become an increasingly common practise in recent years, especially in the RPG genre. Fallout 3 and Fallout: New Vegas are the biggest culprits, but I noted that L.A. Noir has been doing the same, which is more disappointing given the brevity of the original game.
The latter point was pretty much what put me off handing over thirty of my hard-earned (alright, not that hard) pounds: 15 hours of gameplay? Fuck right off. I'll wait till they bring out the "Ultimate Edition" in a year or so.
I fully understand why this happens - developers are playing on our emotional attachments to characters in games we love and are giving us more of them. But I, for one, would much rather they spent the time making a proper full-on sequel: I wouldn't be surprised to see one or two more Dragon Age II packs in the future, when what I really want is a Dragon Age III.
Is the price worth it? Probably not. So why did I pay? Simple - because I'm a complete fucking idiot, and that's why they'll keep getting away it.
A quick word on Dragon Age II: since I first played it (I'm on my second run through now), I've played the original Dragon Age: Origins and in my mind, the original had a much stronger story and character development. Perhaps having a more clearly defined "big bad" (or bads) from the start helped. The ending of the second game felt a bit tacked on, as if the writers had written themselves into a corner and desperately need an exit plan for the storyline.
To start with The Exiled Prince, I was somewhat annoyed with this one, as it turned out that the Prince in question, Sebastian, is actually pretty fucking vital to the plot development at a crucial point. On my original play, without Seb, the point in question passed with a curious sense of something missing. Now I know what it was. Bit of a rip-off there, lads and lasses.
Not that this is anything new, even to this century. Going back to the early 1990s, I can remember Origin bringing out "Expansion Packs" for their Wing Commander and Strike Commander games. I was lucky enough to find the versions that bunged in all the content into one handy package (as I did with Dragon Age: Origins), but it's become an increasingly common practise in recent years, especially in the RPG genre. Fallout 3 and Fallout: New Vegas are the biggest culprits, but I noted that L.A. Noir has been doing the same, which is more disappointing given the brevity of the original game.
The latter point was pretty much what put me off handing over thirty of my hard-earned (alright, not that hard) pounds: 15 hours of gameplay? Fuck right off. I'll wait till they bring out the "Ultimate Edition" in a year or so.
I fully understand why this happens - developers are playing on our emotional attachments to characters in games we love and are giving us more of them. But I, for one, would much rather they spent the time making a proper full-on sequel: I wouldn't be surprised to see one or two more Dragon Age II packs in the future, when what I really want is a Dragon Age III.
Is the price worth it? Probably not. So why did I pay? Simple - because I'm a complete fucking idiot, and that's why they'll keep getting away it.
Friday, 8 July 2011
Off to Silicon Heaven
Old adage: things aren't built to last anymore. I've recently found out to my (financial) cost just how fucking true this is when my Playstation 3 packed in and went to the great gameshop in the sky, a victim of the infamous 'Yellow Light of Death'.
Now, on one level this is just frustrating on what I have lost: my as-yet-unfinished 100 hours playthrough of Dragon Age: Origins Lost! My unbeaten record stats on Buzz! Lost! My achievements on games such as Alpha Protocol and Grand Theft Auto IV. Lost forever! It's very hard to take, believe me. Of course, on the other hand it's an excuse to play all these games again, but it's still very irritating.
But what got to me most of all was when I shared my woe was various others, on replying to their question of how long I had owned the PS3 with "about four years", they came back with "wow, not bad then". It seems in terms of lifespan of this model, I've done well, bearing in mind that while I may not hammer the games for hours every day, I did put some serious hours in and it also acted as my DVD player.
Now, the fact that a machine I paid £260 for some years ago should conk out in less than half a decade seems a bit off to me. After all, my PS2 (bought in 2001) and my PS1 (bought second hand in 1999) still work fine. Man, even my Sega Master System that I got for Christmas sometime in the late 1980s still chugs along quite happily.
The problem, it would appear, is that my PS3 had a failure in being able to cool itself, meaning many microchips got fried. Naturally, I've gone out and bought a new model at some expense. I'm a complete bloody idiot like that. Note, mind you, that I stumped up the extra £70 for a new one, not second hand. Because I learnt that the problem that cursed me can only be sussed by ripping open the console. Let this be a warning to anyone reading - lest the Yellow Light of Death strikes you down.
Now, on one level this is just frustrating on what I have lost: my as-yet-unfinished 100 hours playthrough of Dragon Age: Origins Lost! My unbeaten record stats on Buzz! Lost! My achievements on games such as Alpha Protocol and Grand Theft Auto IV. Lost forever! It's very hard to take, believe me. Of course, on the other hand it's an excuse to play all these games again, but it's still very irritating.
But what got to me most of all was when I shared my woe was various others, on replying to their question of how long I had owned the PS3 with "about four years", they came back with "wow, not bad then". It seems in terms of lifespan of this model, I've done well, bearing in mind that while I may not hammer the games for hours every day, I did put some serious hours in and it also acted as my DVD player.
Now, the fact that a machine I paid £260 for some years ago should conk out in less than half a decade seems a bit off to me. After all, my PS2 (bought in 2001) and my PS1 (bought second hand in 1999) still work fine. Man, even my Sega Master System that I got for Christmas sometime in the late 1980s still chugs along quite happily.
The problem, it would appear, is that my PS3 had a failure in being able to cool itself, meaning many microchips got fried. Naturally, I've gone out and bought a new model at some expense. I'm a complete bloody idiot like that. Note, mind you, that I stumped up the extra £70 for a new one, not second hand. Because I learnt that the problem that cursed me can only be sussed by ripping open the console. Let this be a warning to anyone reading - lest the Yellow Light of Death strikes you down.
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